Surprise Visit

Jessica Aldridge and John Wise in Phoenix, Arizona

Yesterday around noon I learned that my daughter Jessica would be flying into Phoenix for a work-related reason and that she’d be spending the night with us. The exact message was more akin to, “Can you include me in your dinner plans?” She showed up after 6:00 and while I knew, Caroline didn’t have a clue so it was great to see her face when Jessica came strolling up the stairs after I led her through the nearby gate. Their conversation took us to the point we needed to close out the night and wish each other sweet dreams.

Come morning, we took breakfast at an old favorite place where the Triathlete and Quinoa Breakfast Bowl resonate in our smiles. Dropped Caroline at work and did what I do most every day, headed for my first coffee. Jess and I caught up until we could find a small spot in our stomach that said lunch might work and with that, we moved to a place halfway between coffee shop and airport. And then, after one of the briefest of visits ever, my daughter was dropped off at the curb of Terminal 3 at Sky Harbor right at 12:30 for her flight back to San Diego, California. What a nice little surprise.

Family Time – Day 2

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Darkness and cold greeted us as we left our hotel, but the tradeoff was arriving at Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge at the cusp of daybreak. We’ve been here before when it was even colder and the pond we are standing next to was frozen over. But who cares about some chilly weather when already knowing what to expect, we dressed appropriately in order to brave whatever the day had to offer us. The beautiful early morning reflections are not the primary reasons we are here adjacent to the White Sands Missle Range on the Rio Grande River.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Birds, we are here for birds, lots of them. This early, while finding our place in the Refuge, we are not specifically looking for sandhill cranes yet; that’s them standing over their reflections. Nope, we have other birds in our sights. If these first two images above were the best I would have captured while making this visit, I could have gone home happy to have experienced such beautiful sights.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

But we weren’t done witnessing the extraordinary, and then again, who would have driven 450 miles (725km) for only 10 minutes of such things? Not us; we were here to milk nature in order to imbibe this intoxicating mixture of elements from the sky, water, creatures, plants, dirt, sound, smell, and feel. Stirring this all to life was a still-invisible giant ball of fire which was sending us hints like the image above that it was on its way back, just like the snow geese.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

For a good half hour, the snow geese flew in from various corners around the refuge. For reasons beyond our human brains, these bird-brained elegant animals capable of flight choose to congregate here on this lake right before us. They squawk and chatter in a secret language to which the cranes don’t seem to pay any attention, but I do. I want to know what they are saying because after enough of them have come together in a giant love puddle of snow gooseness, they hatch a masterplan that is executed in an instant with a precision that boggles my mind.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

That instant arrives when thousands of snow geese launch themselves off the water and into the sky on their way to points across the landscape to forage for food that their advanced eye-sight is able to glean in ways that insinuate that my own vision might be inferior.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Into the fiery sky, they disperse while we, who will never know what the freedom of self-powered flight is like, stand in awe, gawking at the spectacle of a giant flock of birds.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

In a flash, only the cranes remain.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Well, not only the cranes, as incredible beauty continued hanging out with us hearty travelers who were trying our best to absorb every bit of the visual symphony the scenery was wrapping us in.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Hey, rogue goose, where has your flock gone or are you going solo taking your own path?

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Don’t hesitate to note the important stuff, as some knowledge is transitory, like these birds flying across the scene. What I’m trying to say is that I think we might be at another pond at this point, but I can’t be certain. I’ve looked at the landmarks in the background, but I’m at a loss to find any specificity of location. Does it really matter?

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

I’ll go out on a limb and claim that this murmuration of blackbirds are starlings, but if they really are, I can’t really know.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Sure, the grasses are brown, gold, reddish, and kind of yellow in a palette of fall and winter hues, as are the leafless dormant trees passing through this season, but should you choose to see stagnation, lack of life, or a general sort of dullness, you might be missing the bigger picture. On closer view, the landscape is full of potential and hints of what was in the months leading up to this perfect moment. To be honest, I, probably like you, find particular beauty in scenes such as what is pictured in the very top photo above, but I’d have to attribute that to the rarity of those sights found at dawn. Those early moments at the beginning of the day or the final glow of the last remnants after the sun has dipped below the horizon typically last less than an hour, while the midday light will remain with us for many hours, bathing what we look at in light that isn’t so nuanced and transitory.

Sadly, I can hardly see what personal details and characteristics wild animals have to offer aside from their presence. Obviously, I can tell babies and juveniles from adults, but I cannot comprehend the rarity of them in this environment as I can when relying on photographs where the aging process and choice in clothes convey what stage or point in life the person was. While Jane Goodall was lucky enough to live with apes long enough to identify their personalities and people who have pets learn those animals’ characteristics, I cannot take up a spot here at the refuge where I might encounter the same snow goose or crane on a day to day basis. Instead, I’m stuck with these two loons.

And for loons, there’s only one place to eat while in Socorro, New Mexico and that’s right here at the El Camino Family Restaurant where little more than 12 hours ago we had dinner. Then, in another 8 or 9 hours from now, we’ll be right back here for dinner again, but right now, on this wonderful Christmas morning, we are grabbing breakfast.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

We’d discussed heading north to visit the Salinas Pueblo Missions National Monument series of church ruins but instead opted to return to the Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge (by the way, Bosque is pronounced “bohs-kee” in these parts. We came back for some of the trails we’d never walked before.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

And the man said unto nature, “We humans, in our generosity, have carved out this fraction of the domain your ancestors once knew, but we are not heartless to your plight of a shrinking domain, so here, take this river bottomland we are not interested in and call this home.” Up here on this cliffside, we assumed our perch over the kingdom of creatures so we might better sense the rule of all that is below. This is the joy of being GODS.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

So, if you are the god you so arrogantly claim, how about you demonstrate that lofty position and chow down on this yummy cactus paddle as the javelinas do?

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Or might you be so humble as to organize the atomic and molecular structure of the universe to produce plants just like the force of evolutionary nature does?

Oh, I see how it is; we are here to sow destruction, create entertainment that satisfies our boredom of being horrifically aware of our existence, and steal what we can from all that is or might be as it feeds our sense of superiority. The depth required to be true creators and stewards is elusive to our puny-spirited population of idiots. But not us; we are here on Christmas Day to tread lightly, eschew entertainment and the consumerist experience to find the enchantment nature is putting on display in crazy abundance, delight in this brief moment of existence, and through it all, we hope that we’ve not intruded upon the potential of other life to indulge in another perfect day too.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

While we were here at the Bosque, we walked along, chatted, and obviously took a significant number of photos, maybe too many. Then again, these images capture precisely the world as it looked to us, and as such, they appear unique as they coincide with our memories, whereas someone else’s photo taken on a different day won’t strike the same notes as these will. True, there are images I’ll share here that fail to readily demonstrate in an apparent way why I thought there was something extraordinary about the view and would certainly fail to compel someone else to walk in our footsteps, but they sing to my memories. As others go into their unfolding world using the luxury of digital photography and even a rudimentary ability to write, I’d like to encourage people to record their world in this slow medium, meaning not using video, and then, years down the road revisit these documents and appreciate just how amazing your own memory is in bringing you back to something that might have otherwise been long forgotten.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Hello, future recollections of that day back at the end of 2021 when Caroline, Jessica, and I strolled through this wildlife refuge under fluffy white clouds set against a deep blue sky, and with the sounds of birds in our ears, we just walked along with nowhere else to be.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Maybe in that sense, we were much like these deer who couldn’t have cared about the larger world outside of their immediate experience. They were in the moment having deer thoughts and doing deer things just as we were having human moments doing human things, totally unconcerned with what was happening in the larger outside world beyond being right here.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Screwbean mesquite is a species of the tree that, as far as I can determine with 2 minutes of research on Google, will have that mesquite flavor desired by grillers across the southwest. As for the beans, I’m going to invite Caroline during her editing of this post to learn about the cooking potential they might have and share what she finds. [Screwbean mesquite pods are edible, particularly ground into flour that is gluten-free and nutrient-rich. However, other mesquite species are said to be more flavorful. – Caroline]

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

The Rio Viejo trail follows a former riverbed of the Rio Grande that’s now on the other side of a berm to our far left. In its stead is this trail, the screwbean mesquite trees, along with a bunch of cottonwoods. At this time of day, though, there weren’t many birds here.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

But there was a group of javelina coming out of the nearby brush, and as we stood silently, allowing them to do and go about their business, they slowed down, checked us out, and continued on their way.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

We counted eight javelinas in this squadron (I looked that up). Walking out of the bush and prior to sensing us, they were preoccupied foraging for whatever it was they were sampling from the forest floor. I’m guessing we were afforded the close encounter with these peccaries due to the direction the wind was blowing, but when they got within about 20 feet of us, they’d stop, and while looking straight at us, their snouts started frantically wiggling as though they were evaluating the potential threat in front of them that they likely could barely see. Lucky us, we could see them all quite clearly, but unfortunately, they never were in the right position for us to gather a good sniff of their musky stink that earned them the nickname skunk pigs.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

We’ve continued up the dirt road going north to position ourselves near the Coyote Deck. From here, we’ll just hang out a good long while before continuing the loop toward where our day began.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

From corners far and wide, the geese are heading back to the safety of the ponds where they can pull up their pillows and get some rest, safe from the coyotes that would gladly make feasts of the abundance of these feathery treats.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Just as we were about to head back to the hotel so we could catch something or other on TV, maybe some football, even more birds came flying in. Don’t you just hate it when you know there’s something worthwhile on the television and nature keeps interrupting you from getting back to the important stuff, like watching all of those old Christmas movies you’ve already seen dozens of times before because It’s a Wonderful Life is just that great? Yeah, well, I was being cheeky, and although it’s Christmas day and the romantic drivel of consumer-driven merrymaking is supposed to be all the rage along with this fakey nostalgia for such ugly, repetitive nonsense, I’d rather tell you to go stuff yourself regarding traditions…watching wild birds in the air rocks while roasted geese on your table are sad and tragic, just like your pathetic lives in front of idiot boxes.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Everything in that paragraph above was written by my wife, Caroline, against my wishes as I would never take such Scrooge-like digs at this Great American Holiday, which represents the best of what we have to offer as a free and decent people. As a matter of fact, I regret that we skipped out of Phoenix for years so we could avoid my mother during Thanksgiving, as who wanted to be part of that shit show?

Editors Note: Again, my wife has taken certain liberties with this last sentence to make me appear as some kind of crude curmudgeon with a broken sentimentality organ. I would never talk ill of the dead.

Note of Truth: Okay, so I take full responsibility for all of the text in this post, but after writing for the 28 photos that preceded this descent into farce, I just couldn’t come up with nice flowery things to continue rambling about the refuge and our delight at being here. So, I took a tangent, but after 2,000 words and so many photos, there’s NO WAY anyone is still reading this; even the Google indexing algorithm probably dipped out about a thousand words ago.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Hey John, instead of turning this obviously wonderful experience into a tragic parody of some poorly executed attempt at humor, why not just delete some photos, consolidate the text, and make this easier on all of us? My best answer is, when I was choosing photos in the days leading up to the point I’d start writing, I was certain that I required every single photo I’d chosen because each had the potential to be great if only I could add some meaningful poetic musings to elevate them. Instead, I’ve, in effect, maligned the magnificence of these cranes, some geese, too, as I channeled grumpy John.

Then again, do I really look all that grumpy? By the way, my daughter used to have the world’s stinkiest feet. We recently learned it could have been due to a type of bacteria that apparently also affects dogs, so if I were a betting man, I’d say my weird-ass daughter likely played footsy with her dogs back when they were still alive. I point out their life status as after staying with her in more than a few hotel rooms this year; we’ve not had one gacking moment, not even a little one. That’s my daughter in the middle for those of you who don’t know, and maybe I should also point out finally that she blogs, occasionally as poorly as I do, over at TheJessicaness.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Bright golden grass growing out of the shallow waters of this pond with the sun setting couldn’t be left behind. Writing that, I can’t help but think about how often I have wanted to leave my daughter and her rotting feet behind, but something compelled me to keep dragging her along. Ha, no, that didn’t happen; she’s married, and lucky for me, her husband Caleb somehow adapted to enduring the wretched stench of a magnitude compared to which even my farts smelled subtle and nearly insignificant. But enough of this airing of dirty feet on my eloquent and lovely blog I’m soiling with remembering my daughter just this way on Christmas; I’ll move on, I swear.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Sunset is coming, which means we are about to leave for dinner, and I have nothing else to say.

Bosque del Apache near Socorro, New Mexico

Really, nothing. Okay, here’s a Merry Christmas, but that’s it.

Family Time – Day 1

Caroline Wise, Jessica Aldridge, and John Wise on the road in Arizona

What is the problem with these women I’m traveling with? We are delving into the depths of hell, and they smile while my look of incredulity (not to be confused with uncertainty if my fart was wet) is signaling that something is wrong in this car we are currently in. I’ve said it before, and I should say it again: driving is no excuse to stop taking selfies in a moving vehicle, even if that selfie requires multiple takes and posing.

My original plan saw us leaving Phoenix at 9:30 for the road eastward that would bring us to Miami, Arizona, and the fine Mexican cuisine found at Guayo’s El Rey, specifically their carne asada, which is probably the best I’ve ever had. By leaving at 9:30, we’d arrive as they opened the doors at 11:00; well, we didn’t get out until shortly after 11:00 because I got stuck conversing with an old friend at the coffee shop into which we were dipping for 2 minutes in order to grab coffees for the road. It turned out that we were all finished with our coffees before we ever got underway.

Out near Safford, Arizona

Hey, what’s this hell you speak of? First things first, lunch was amazing, and with stomachs stuffed full, we were back out on Highway 60, driving east through heavy rain until we reached Highway 70 and continued towards Lordsburg, New Mexico. Somewhere out on the San Carlos Apache Indian Reservation, the clouds started breaking up, and near Safford, Arizona, we were treated to dramatic skies and this small bit of rainbow.

Last night (or was it this morning?), we finally decided on our reading material for this road trip: Lord Of Dark Places by Hal Bennett. Mind you that Caroline and I are currently immersed in Marcel Proust’s In Search of Lost Time, but dropping Jessica right into the middle of that book (we’ve already finished Swann’s Way, which is Part 1 of 5) would be unfair to her as it takes some time to get into the flow of this tome of flowery prose, so we opted to start something else.

Out near Safford, Arizona

Something else is an appropriate description of Lord of Dark Places. I first heard of this book from YouTuber Cliff Sergeant, who publishes under the channel titled Better Than Food.

Out near Safford, Arizona

Lord of Dark Places opens rough and becomes jagged quickly. Glimmers of light are not to be found under the gloom as the horizon is filling with carnage and depravity. I am reluctant to share that we’d even read this or would be willing to mention the name of this gut-puncher, but the incredible writing pulls you forward like a log being dragged into a buzzsaw. While I’ve now given this nod to Lord of Dark Places, I find myself unable to share much more than the fact that we could barely travel more than a couple of minutes before the next stretch of rough, cringy road was encountered and, obviously, I’m not referring to the road on which we are driving east.

Jessica Aldridge in Duncan, Arizona

Here we are ten years after Jessica, and I passed through here on a day trip out of Phoenix at the very same truck in Duncan, Arizona, in which she sat as part of a short story that was included in a book we put together for her during a spring break.

Somewhere in southwest New Mexico

We are near the state border with New Mexico and still fully entrenched and mesmerized with the book that continues to deliver body blows to our senses, though the aesthetics of what is unfolding couldn’t be more real.

Somewhere in southwest New Mexico

Day is about to give way to night, and the delay from the poor weather earlier is impacting what time we thought we’d arrive in Socorro, but we should make it in time.

Jessica Aldridge in Socorro, New Mexico

It’s 8:30 as we pull into a parking spot at the El Camino Family Restaurant in Socorro, New Mexico. While Jessica was just here with me back in August, Caroline hasn’t been here in years. It’s been said countless times before, but this New Mexican version of Denny’s is our favorite roadside stop for breakfast or dinner while we are visiting the western side of the state. Getting in at this time was nearly too late as the kitchen now stops taking orders at 9:15; sadly, prior to the pandemic, this place was open 24/7.

Today’s journey across the desert, while beautiful, was overshadowed by the power and depravity found in Lord of Dark Places and the places it brought us to. We won’t have a lot of time in the book on Christmas day as we have other plans that won’t see us on the road very much, but having gotten halfway through it, we should be able to finish it on the way home. As for my Steak Tampico here at El Camino? I’m never disappointed with the same thing I have every time we eat here.

America Ends In Black & White

El Camino Family Restaurant in Socorro, New Mexico

The venerable coffee shop and diner, an institution on the great American road trip, is faltering. Here is where our day should have begun, but with food prices rising, pay demands of those toiling in the service industry, and the migration of previously independent people moving back home due to dire economic consequences brought on by a pandemic, restaurants have little choice but to shut down or scale back operations, just as this institution in Socorro, New Mexico, had to do.

I wonder how much doubt was alive and well in those businesses that cater to the travel industry as the world entered the summer, not knowing which direction COVID-19 was going to take. Sure, many of us rushed to get vaccinated as soon as we could earlier in the year, but an equal number are swearing off ever getting a vaccination. So, with uncertainty about how things would progress, businesses appeared to be reluctant to staff up, especially knowing that there would be no global travelers descending on America, and this was compounded by shortages of parts and supplies that hamper car rental agencies trying to ramp up their fleets, which left everyone scratching their heads about what to do.

What everyone did was raise prices. Hotels and motels out here are expensive, car rentals are pricey, and feeding a family of four at even cheap restaurants is just shy of or even more than $100 for dinner. Caroline and I paid over $50 for breakfast on the California Coast back in May. As the green is being drained away by the higher cost of living, diminished opportunity, and a population moving in reverse intellectually, the colorful sparkle that has been so attractive about life in America is starting to appear tarnished.

Turbine blade in Magdalena, New Mexico

Wind power is quietly being deployed across our country. Elon Musk has battled scorn and disbelief from those angry about the move from gasoline-powered cars to self-drive electric vehicles, but now all manufacturers are on board, validating his initiatives. Drought and fire are scarring the land and polluting the air, but still, a large segment of our population wants to deny that we are having any impact on the environment. Coal is still a critical element in our energy supply, though we are well aware of how it fouls water and air.

I want to see red, but I’m afraid that the opaque nature of our collective intelligence is blocking us from engaging in meaningful discussions that would be required to foster an embrace of change. The color drains from hope.

Very Large Array in Datil, New Mexico

We try to communicate with aliens and land all manner of craft on Mars, but we can’t get through the backward attitudes buried deep in thick skulls. Many are entrenched in the fight against the perceived existential threat that they might have to change and learn anew how and where to operate in our world. We risk becoming aliens to modernity as we resist launching ourselves into new horizons. Searching the heavens with telescopes will never bring blue-sky clarity to a population mired in a universe of denial. As knowledge is passed through society, those entrenched in fear and conspiracy become negative refraction materials, suppressing humanity’s move toward greater enlightenment.

Very Large Array in Datil, New Mexico

Fences keep animals in an enclosed area, but they also keep out trespassers. I wonder when knowledge became a dangerous beast that required barriers to keep the peace. Fences, while at times transparent, also arrive in the form of walls that stop others from looking in. It is my belief that we are building metaphoric walls between those who embrace the future and those who abhor the idea of any contact with things that might alter their intellectual underpinnings, such as they are.

Pies in Pie Town, New Mexico

There are spectrums of light, sound, thoughts, and flavors. When these things are refracted, they produce various phenomena that delight human senses. Take sunlight and water vapor; we see its effect in the sky when rainbows appear. Flavors, when combined, become something greater than the constituent parts. Thoughts become inventions and art, while sound can be formed into the music that makes us dance. When the vibrancy of potential in these spectra is diminished or even squashed between two poles, we are left with a damaged system of noise; dreams are turned black and white.

I will not choose between cherry or poop pie; that’s not a choice. I want a menu that features peach, coconut cream, apple, blackberry, and even pumpkin; I want to choose from a diversity of flavors. That diversity is a fact of life, but it doesn’t only govern our food, music, TV, and racial makeup; we must also adopt a diversity of thought. Right now, we are in a cultural war with only poop and rainbow pie on the menu; well, I’m ready for a heaping slice of rainbow pie while I still have a choice. The people eating a daily diet of Carlson Tucker’s secret poop pie recipe should consider the old saying, “You are what you eat.”

To try and exist on a monotrophic diet both physically or intellectually will ultimately damage your health,  meaning you cannot eat carrots three times a day every day for years without consequences. And yet, this is what many Americans do regarding their intake of echo-chamber information. But why are so many returning again and again to the same thing? Fear. They are afraid that if they challenge their monolithic belief system, the world around them will collapse. Therefore they come back to the trough of affirmation that convinces them that only the poop pie will nourish them while everyone else nursing at the teat of the rainbow unicorn is being poisoned and will soon metamorphize into the spawn of demons, communists, pedophiles, or other detritus that they consider dangerous to their way of life.

The point here is that we need a spectrum of options that is not a bucket load of the same old, same old. Our world needs colorful alternatives. If things are only black or white, there are no choices for those who want to exist somewhere in the middle.

Near Hannagan Meadow on the Coronado Scenic Byway in Eastern Arizona

When culture and society are built like a house of cards, time and weather will easily wear down the structure, making the shelter quickly uninhabitable. America is in the process of breaking out the windows, punching holes into the roof and walls, and tossing out the conveniences of comfort that are the underpinnings of our country. It’s as though the outside is fighting to be inside, and the inside wants outside, or maybe they just want to eliminate differences by subordinating one to the other so all of it is the same.

Near Hannagan Meadow on the Coronado Scenic Byway in Eastern Arizona

But when we walk together, live together, and recognize our similarities, a different world opens where harmony might emerge. Out of harmony, we create new things, such as when we take up partners and produce offspring. Similarly, when harmony arises in a population, we create a culture that brings society forward and ultimately leads to an increase in the standard of living and access to more tools for even greater expression. Through creative expression and invention, we stand apart from the animals. Without it, we become the animals.

Near Hannagan Meadow on the Coronado Scenic Byway in Eastern Arizona

We step over barriers when we are at our best as we recognize that one side is much like the other. But if that barrier is a line demarking an ideological divide, then we bring weapons to defend this imaginary border, be they verbal or physical. The resultant stalemate or total conflagration might allow one side to hold their ground and not let the other take influence over their sacred beliefs and ways of living, but both sides ultimately lose out. Our fear of that onslaught that would accompany change has us needing to reinforce the dividing wall or fence that keeps us separate. This backward thinking is the fodder of intellectual regression and war.

Coronado Scenic Byway in Eastern Arizona

The space between earth and clouds is vast, with a near-infinite number of hues that paint the landscape. Every minute of every day, life is coming and going, the clouds stream by, we grow older, and nothing is quite the same. It is this dynamic shifting of the view and our place in it that enchants so many of us humans into delight when we are afforded the luxury of watching big nature execute its script of constant change. And yet, we recoil at the thought of our own change, maybe because we are ultimately afraid of our own death, but that’s childish as this is at the heart of the contract that we must live with.

Jessica Aldridge on the Coronado Scenic Byway in Eastern Arizona

Right there in the middle between sky and ground, here and there, left and right, storm and sun, home and open road, experience is waiting for us to toss off inertia and put ourselves into the mix. We cannot find what we don’t know without moving into the unknown. If you’ve never been down the highway that takes you elsewhere, then how will you discover what might be right in front of you?

Copper mine in Morenci, Arizona

Down in the pit, deep below the surface, under the mountain, this is where we bury our demons, our poisons, our dead. In that darkness, there are no colors or light other than the eternal bleakness of being rendered blind. This is where the unilluminated minds of the voluntarily ignorant choose to exist, though they are convinced that all is bright and crystal clear to them and, often, only them. Throughout history, we have always looked uncomfortably at the wounds and scars that are opened in our efforts to make progress. Progress is only found in the march forward into certain uncertainty. You cannot escape the darkness, cowering under the rock you’ve always known.

Big Horn Sheep in Clifton, Arizona

Even if you need to stand alone, get out there and see what the potentially hostile terrain has to offer. There is nearly always something that can nourish you, even in the middle of the desert. Along the way, you might find that who you are traveling with is not really who you think they are, and when that person is you, you cannot simply deny things; you must keep going and find fertile ground. Don’t stop moving. Continue your march forward; you’ll likely ascend mountains if you just remain in motion.

La Paloma Mexican Restaurant in Solomon, Arizona

At the end of the road, oh yeah, there is no end of the road; there’s just one more short pause on the way forward. But, when you sit down again to your diet of carrots with your closed mind and your fear of encountering what you don’t know yet, just remember that a world without the color of the rainbow is a world stuck between black and white, and you are only experiencing a tiny fraction of what the full spectrum of life has to offer.

Decaying Rural Southwest

Yesterday, I was writing about the American Prairie Reserve and the ranchers who are opposed to the idea of preserving a wide swath of the Great Plains for the native grasses and animals that once populated these lands, and yet, most of what might have been here during a time of prosperity has disappeared. What you find in the rural middle of America and the Southwest is decay. Cities are really where everything is happening now and about the only place to find work.

The idea of a renaissance in which high-paying jobs return to the middle of America is a pipe dream where the infrastructure to support tech workers is sorely missing. Add to the complicated situation that in many small towns, the locals do not want outsiders moving in and telling them how to do things, though they do appreciate visitors stopping by to spend money on hotels, food, and gas to support the few businesses that are hanging on. There are many small towns scattered across America that would be ideal for well-paid workers who can operate remotely to take up residence, but the dearth of grocery stores, immediacy of Amazon deliveries, and forward-thinking by the locals make this a daunting challenge.

Sure, wind and solar power installations are promising industries in these empty lands, but once constructed, they operate mostly autonomously, so there is no long-term win to this possibility. Then there are those small towns that flip the need for blue-collar jobs on its head as the very wealthy adopt locations they find appealing. Just consider Jackson Hole, Wyoming; Telluride, Colorado; and Sun Valley, Idaho; these small towns only thrive due to the exclusivity brought on by the profound wealth that was able to squeeze out the non-rich residents. Labor is then relegated to nearby towns where those lower-paid workers must commute to the only jobs that allow them to stay near the area they may have grown up in.

Sure, there’s a tremendous amount of pride among the people who survive on these hardscrabble lands, and they’d pay a hell of a personal price to try to integrate into some of our bigger cities but without growing populations and new industries or workers establishing themselves in these thousands of far-flung towns, what are the odds of their survival?

Over the years, we’ve driven through some beautiful old places that visually are incredibly enticing, but the majority of their storefronts have been shuttered long ago. The slow decay which ushers in the sadness of a place leaves bitter anger in its wake. I don’t mean to imply that only grumpy people remain as we meet some wonderful people along the way. But, after enough time out here in small cafes and gas stations and poking around ruins, closed businesses, and other curiosities, it’s bound to happen that you eavesdrop on anger or are confronted by someone who doesn’t have time for someone interested in things they don’t want you to be interested in.

Then, on the other hand, there’s the wildlife that, aside from often being afraid of people as they seem to sense our murderous intent, just go about their lives making the best of whatever is in front of them. If you don’t believe they see through us, just watch them when other species are around. I’ve seen rabbits hanging out with birds, deer grazing near donkeys, prairie dogs chilling with hawks, and they all just get along. Okay, I’m joking about that last one, as prairie dogs will tear those hawks some new b-holes in a second.

Another dirt road, but not the one I thought I wanted. While it will get us where we’re going, the passage of time lets me forget how Caroline and I got to the same destination 15 years earlier. No matter, as it’s beautiful out this way.

As Jessica and I drove through Canadian, Texas, and I recounted Caroline’s and my July 4th, 2006 celebration of Independence Day with a parade, rodeo, small fair, and fireworks, I mentioned that we’d stayed at the ranch house featured in the Tom Hanks film Cast Away. Asking if Jess was curious to see it and that it was nearby, we meandered out the dirt roads that brought us here.

The old house that still looked pristine six years after Cast Away was released is now showing some serious wear. We learned from the Arrington family back then about the problems with ranching in this region due to depleting groundwater and drought, so there are those issues of needing the capital to support life out this way. Some months ago, I wrote to Mike and Debbie (the Arringtons) about the possibility of renting the property again but was informed that the bed and breakfast side of the ranch was no longer available.

One-thousand thirty-eight miles ago, we turned south and had already spoken with a few people who were lamenting the drought conditions and grasshopper infestation. Well, we are in Texas now, and true to form, things are bigger out here. The grasshopper on the right was already bigger than the ones we saw jumping away from the car when we had stopped for photos in North and South Dakota. The grasshopper on the left could have been saddled and ridden off into the sunset; it was close to being reclassified as a monster.

Tiptoeing On The Ocean Of Storms is the name of the sculpture of astronaut Alan L. Bean, who was the 4th person to walk on the moon. This monument to a favorite son of Wheeler, Texas, stands in front of the local historical museum. Even the road out front (U.S. Route 83) has been renamed in honor of Captain Bean.

The anger I spoke of earlier is not hidden; it is in plain sight, and the juxtaposition of the assault rifle with the church that is reflected in the window speaks to the fundamental zealotry that has festered in these corners of America. Sadly, or maybe fortunately, this will all disappear as these towns continue their decay into irrelevance.

These two photos of the rifle and this absolutely empty main street play testament to my supposition that towns such as Shamrock, Texas, pictured here and a broad array of others up and down the middle of America will continue their fade-out. I find this tragic as it speaks volumes to the type of mentality that populates these remote corners where people are inflexible, under-educated, and often afraid of change though they’d likely challenge my gross characterization, possibly even with a weapon, thus proving the above.

Back in the day, at the height of Shamrock’s population, the town had nearly 3,800 citizens, but today, that’s about half of what it was. Old U.S. Route 66 intersected with U.S. Route 83 as people passed through the crossroads of America right here, but that time is over, and discovery and exploration are relics from a different age.

After 1,125 miles (1,810 kilometers) on the 83 South, we turned west on Texas Highway 256. We peeled off 20 miles early before reaching Childress, Texas, as we tried to shave some driving time off the day.

Why did the javelina cross the road? Don’t answer, as it didn’t end well. A few feet away from this lifeless creature was the truck driver’s license plate that was torn from the vehicle, so if the person who lost Texas plate number AK5 6815 ever looks for that number, here’s the animal your truck took out.

Welcome to Lesley, Texas, a great place for people looking to photograph the spreading decline of America and a horrible reminder of what it once was to the handful of people who might still live in the area.

I don’t think this recliner has seen use in many a year though the birds seem to enjoy pooping on the left corner of it when they’re not taking aim at the walls.

The first thing my daughter noticed here was the 1970s plastic cup holder over the sink. I think she wanted it. Come to think about it, she might have snagged it because while she went upstairs to explore that area, I ventured outside, but not before…

…I admired the toilet with an open lid that I could only imagine what was in it. You see, I was afraid to step into this room because I couldn’t be certain how much floor damage might have occurred from water, and my curiosity to peer into a potentially shit-filled bowl was lower than my sense of preservation that wanted to remain in the light.

Speaking of remaining in the light and sketchy floors, the neighboring house met all the criteria of being a place I wasn’t going to step into, and while you probably can’t see it over on the left at the lower corner of the window is a small part of a hive of bees. Below that is the larger part of the hive that is peeking out of the dark hole and is moving along the lower wall. I was looking at 1000s of these chill bees that, fortunately for me, were not disturbed by my presence.

Look at my horse. My horse is amazing. Give it a lick, Ooh, it tastes just like raisins.

Dimmitt, Texas is not a misspelling, as I was reassured that a Dimwitt would only be found in the mirror. Had we arrived an hour earlier, we could have eaten here, so it goes.

What is it about grain silos that are such interesting architectural structures? Maybe it’s the repeating megalithic brutalist forms they take? Or maybe it’s their demonstration of historical significance and the lingering echoes of the steam trains pulling through to collect the wheat or barley for hauling across America? Whatever it is, I know that when I see these silos off in the distance, there’s a likelihood I’ll be stopping to snap a photo or two of them.

Getting closer to home as our trip is winding down fast.

Before we’re even 50 feet into New Mexico, we get to encounter our first abandoned building, an old motel. This dilapidated place rests in decay in the small town of Texico, New Mexico. I think the founders of this town were being cute when they married Texas to Mexico. This motel used to be known as the Cross Roads Motel, and from the state of the sign out front, I’d have to guess it hasn’t been deserted for all that long.

The empty toilet paper roll is right across from the toilet that had been used fairly recently; I hope the person knew before they started their business that there’d be nothing to wipe with. Just as I’m writing that I realized that the shower curtain is still there, so in an emergency, I guess it could be used to clean the old b-hole.

Yeso, New Mexico is a big Nogo these days.

Here we are in the Mesa Hotel, which was a museum at one time after the demise of the building’s use as a lodging stop. Though the faded paint is difficult to read, you can still make out that rooms used to cost from 75 cents to one dollar.

It seems that Yeso came into being as a train stop, and when trains transitioned from coal and steam power to diesel, the need for the station that existed here was no more. So began the decline of another outpost in the frontier.

Looking for details regarding Yeso after getting home, I learned that there’s still a single resident living here in town. Her name is Deborah Dawson, and I can only wish we’d met her. I suppose if she made herself known to everyone who stops to look around she’d be a full-time tour guide for the curious.

Like hotel rooms that used to go for a dollar, it’s been many years since a tobacco seller supplied businesses with sponsored signage announcing their opening and closing hours. That business now belongs to Visa/Mastercard it seems.

Maybe you are wondering if there are any viable towns remaining on the route we’ve taken, and the answer would be a resounding yes. While not one of them feels like a place to find success or even a future, they do exist. From Minot and Bismarck, North Dakota; Pierre, South Dakota; and North Platte, Nebraska, there are those places that appear to be holding on, but in over 1,000 miles, those were about it.

Another 50 miles west, and we pull into Encino, New Mexico. Do you see a trend?

And then the real treasure is found just off the road on a small spur where nearly a dozen vehicles are pulled over. Under one of these giant turbine blades, a few people sat just finishing up dinner. We learned that these loads travel pretty quickly, but how long they can be on the road in one day is limited. At approximately 200 feet long from the nose of the semi to the tip of the blade behind them, these are some seriously long loads. One of the guys demonstrates how flexible these fiberglass creations are and allows us to reach up and touch them. For something that weighs more than 10,000 pounds each, they sure are easy to move.

Another day with a ton of miles accumulating behind us, but we still have a good amount of time before we reach the end of today’s road.

I, for one, can never get enough of spectacular sunsets, and this one being filtered through the heavy smoke from the California fire allows us to look at the sun with our naked eye. Not good for the environment, but it sure plays pretty with the aesthetic.

The sign is the worst for wear, and COVID has created the situation that our old favorite stop in Socorro is now closed Monday and Tuesday in addition to closing at 9:00 or 10:00 p.m. depending on staffing, but lucky for us, we arrived on a Sunday night before they locked the doors. The El Camino Family Restaurant has served us countless times on our journeys into and across the region. Our motel tonight was just short of being a nightmare, but when everything else is costing $159 and up, what should one expect for $67? Tomorrow is the beginning of the end.

The Middle Is In The Middle

It rained last night, and with the downpour, a good amount of thunder, lightning, and wind arrived. Since we were in Pierre, South Dakota, of course, I worried about tornados while Jessica was asleep, deeply oblivious to the chaos outside our window. Come morning we woke with the rising sun and minutes later took a short drive through the state capital looking for photographic moments but didn’t really find anything, so with over 650 miles of driving ahead of us, we were gone. The sun is illuminating its reflection in the Missouri River.

We are remaining on U.S. Route 83 as the plan for this vacation was to cover as much of this route south as we could drive.

This is not the first field of sorghum we’ve driven by, nor will it be the last.

Driving, talking, looking for something to photograph as my daughter Jessica attempts to endure another day of her father’s lectures about all things important (to him). Should she read this particular paragraph, I wonder how she’ll react to the truth that this 4,500-mile haul through the middle of the middle was designed to offer me a platform to lecture her ear off. Maybe she’ll even chuckle at this absurd thought, as although I did talk a lot, no surprise to anyone who knows me; we shared many a moment of laughter about everything under the sun, smoke, heavy clouds, and the overbearing nature of a dad with infinite opinions.

We had a small encounter with Interstate 90 going west to Murdo as the 83 was eaten by progress, but when we got there, the road was closed. A nice enough guy explained that the road ahead was under construction and that with last night’s rains, the mud was too thick to drive through, so we’d have to get back on the 90, returning the way we had come back to the Vivian exit. On South Dakota road number 53, we’d have 7 miles of pavement before we’d have to drive about 25 miles on gravel. He assured us that the road would be just fine.

Being the idiot I often am, I started anticipating the low point on the road where water would have accumulated and make us turn back. The idea that we’d have to return to the 90, go west more than twice as far as we’d already driven to take another road south would mean we’d lose more than two hours here at the beginning of the day, wrecking the chance of getting to our destination. That wouldn’t have been too horrible necessarily as nothing is ever fixed in stone, and of course, there’s flexibility in all things, but all the same, I like reaching my goals.

My eyes were peeled on the lookout for rain clouds that never arrived. The dreaded muddy spots remained at bay, and after nearly an hour plodding along through the rolling hills of South Dakota, we returned to pavement and ultimately the 83 again.

We are inching closer to the middle of America though we are still a good 300 miles away from the absolute geographic center over in Lebanon, Kansas. Caroline and I have been to Lebanon twice (once with our friend Jay), but this trip doesn’t include taking my daughter there. When we reach Oberlin, Kansas, later in the day, we’ll only be 110 miles from that center point, but we can’t afford the time it would take to get there and back. Plus, I don’t want to deviate any further from the 83 than I have to. I suppose that, in some way, I might have a bit of OCD behavior that can be tempered by the silly idea that, at times, I can do it all, even if that means throwing my well-laid plans to the side.

Looking for something, anything, that might capture the essence of the road we’re traveling has us making random stops, hoping for that thing that stands out and might become a part of the story. Well, here we are at an intersection where the utility poles stand at the center of attention. As a younger man, I might have thought this was boring, but today, I understand how fortunate I am to be in a place where the stark aesthetic quality of something so simple and common, and which might otherwise go unseen, can draw my attention.

Neglect the old on the margin and bring the new to center stage. Here I am, standing on the former U.S. Route 83 that wasn’t worth saving and so the new improved version we’ve been driving was built in walking distance parallel to the old road. I guess it was too expensive to remove the pavement to remediate the landscape, and, given enough time, nature will eat the evidence of our presence.

The North Loup River winds its way through the middle of Nebraska before joining the Loup River well east of here. It then runs into the North Platte River, which dumps into the Missouri River south of Omaha.

In Thedford, Nebraska, we waited for this train to pass. It seemed to be hauling at least 100 cars, all of them filled to the top with coal.

Ninety-five years ago, this old segment of U.S. Route 83 started taking shape. Today, we are watching its final moments as it folds into the surrounding earth. It’s kind of silly, my obsession with relics and the value I put on their historic value. I know I’m not alone, but would be interested in reading someone’s thesis that details this form of nostalgia for things we never personally experienced.

I forgot to point out that while we were in Montana, signs were posted far and wide across the environment. They were calling attention to the movement to stop the American Prairie Reserve from setting aside a protected area where elk, pronghorn, prairie dogs, and, of course, bison would be free to roam. This restoration idea is running afoul of ranchers who want the land to remain available for feeding their cattle and future farmers. The groups that are against this grand idea are taking the position that it will kill off the cowboys and turn these lands into recreation areas for the “elites.” Silly how they fail to see the opportunity for camping in these open lands, resorts on the edges of a giant wildlife sanctuary, and attracting people to eco-friendly adventures and experiences otherwise not available. Such is the reality of people locked in their short-sighted paradigms of routine. Better to go with what you know than risk reinventing yourself.

Is that giant flatness out there, possibly Kansas?

Sure enough, we are dead square in the heartland.

It’s not long, though, before some seriously foul weather moves in and our phones light up with warnings that extremely severe rain, wind, and hail are about to impact the area. For less than one minute, we considered trying to race down the road, but the rain came on so hard we backtracked a quarter mile to the gas station we’d just passed and parked the car under a diesel pump awning. Good thing we acted when we did, as within just a few more minutes, people were crowded around any bit of cover they could find to protect their vehicles. Just as there was a break in the chaos, an 18-wheeler pressed close to our running car, trying to nudge me out of my spot. I wasn’t sure if the driver wanted to fill up or just protect his expensive truck from damage. No matter, he was aggressively trying to get us to move, and I obliged.

As we continued south, the violent storm continued its trek to the northeast. We were driving through nervously, keeping our eyes on the weather all around us.

To live in the deserts of Arizona is about as good as it gets, as we do not have earthquakes, tornadoes, hurricanes, massive flooding, sub-zero winters, days of continuous gray skies, or brutal humidity. We have a couple of months of severe heat, but then again, everything is air-conditioned. Of course, we have some looming drought issues on our horizon, but we are not under threat of falling into the earth or being blown off of it.

It’ll be dark in Liberal, Kansas, when we get there, but we’ll have skirted the storms that later this evening will bring severe flooding to Omaha, Nebraska. The light show from the spiderweb-like lightning gracing the skies was incredible, which can’t be said about the profoundly mediocre meal we had at the highest-rated restaurant in this small town with a shrinking population known as Liberal.

In yesterday’s post, I mentioned the Wizard of Oz and Dorothy’s house. True enough, there’s a replica here at the edge of town, but we’ll never see it as we have 9.5 hours of driving tomorrow we’ll likely turn into 14 hours of fatigue.