There are two questions you might have in mind by now, first, what will you do for Caroline’s 50th birthday – that’s a secret, and yes I have something working. The other question, just what kind of things did you get that you made it to 40 gifts for Caroline’s 40th birthday? Here’s the rundown:

(1) Large homemade birthday card. (2) A box with a note in it. (3) A German music CD from 2RaumWohnung titled 36 Grad. (4) Spin-Off magazine. (5) Dizzy Yarn Gauge. (6) Niddy Noddy. (7) Drop Spindle. (8) Mini Niddy Noddy. (9) The Spinning Companion – book. (10) Kool-Aid for dyeing fibers. (11) Yarn Lover’s Guide to Hand Dyeing – book. (12) One pound Acala Cotton fiber. (13) Spinning Cotton on a Charkha – DVD. (14) Indigo, Madder, and Marigold – dyeing book. (15) Indigo Dye Kit. (16) One pound Pima Cotton fiber. (17) The Rainbow Beneath My Feet – dyeing with mushrooms book. (18) Charkha. (19) One pound Long Staple Cotton – fiber. (20) Half pound Flax – fiber. (21) Half pound Hemp – fiber. (22) One pound Organic Brown Cotton – fiber. (23) One pound Sea Island Organic Cotton – fiber. (24) Puni’s – cotton fiber from India. (25) Ramie / China Grass – fiber. (26) Half pound Bamboo Top – fiber. (27) Half pound Black Diamond Bamboo Top – fiber. (28) Half pound Silk – fiber. (29) Half pound Soysilk – fiber. (30) Half pound Soy Cashmere – fiber. (31) 8 x 10 book of 70 of our photos for dyeing inspiration. (32) Rust and Compost Dyeing – books. (33) Yarrrn T-Shirt. (34) Dyers Garden – book. (35) Dyeing Station. (36) Dye Supplies. (37) Natural and Procion MX Cellulose Dyes. (38) Hot Plate for heating dyes. (39) Crock-Pot for heating dyes. (40) Microwave Oven – because you always have to give some stupid household item as a gift – just kidding, this is a dedicated microwave used in the process of dyeing fibers and yarns.

No time for a witty explanation of the sign on the door, this is too small to read in this photo, so here was the text Caroline read as she approached our front door on her birthday:

40: There must be something special about the number 40. 40 years old – quite the accomplishment. 40 could be considered middle-age. But for you, 40 will forever be a wonderful number. In 40 seconds you have to open the door. You must be thinking of 40 reasons why not to open the door. NO – There are not 40 people in there about to scream Happy Birthday to you. But, 40 figures prominently on this 12th day of December. Take a deep breath – 40 if you need to. Grab the door handle. Close your eyes – No cheating. Open the door. Take two steps forward. And open your 40-year-old eyes to the man who loves you more than ever.

Time to take it up a notch, my bright ideas that is. 40 gifts weren’t enough; they needed 40 wrapping papers, but what then? Lump them together on the floor as a birthday mountain? Create a layout in blocks or steps as a kind of Enochian magic square representing the 40 gifts of wisdom and understanding? Har, got you on this pun; you see, Caroline’s maiden name is Engelhardt, or angel heart, and Enochian is the angelic language, so this layout would have a deeper meaning to my wife with the angel heart. No, her gifts did not end up as a set of angelic keys, I had greater plans. Why not hang them from the ceiling at eye height? Told you, this was uncontrolled stupidity. Time to buy 3 miles of fishing line, break out the ladder, tie up the packages, cut the proper lengths of line, and in less than 3 hours hang 34 gifts – thank god 6 gifts were outside on a shelf, that really saved me.

How many times did people ask me, where are you hiding so many gifts? There was a point I was afraid I wouldn’t remember them all. I had stuff in the trunk of the car, hidden behind blankets in the cabinet, in brown boxes in the top of our walk-in closet, in a storage closet outside, the pantry. I numbered the gifts, not just so Caroline would have an order in which to open them but for me to be sure on the 12th that all the gifts were accounted for. Even after numbering them, I felt this was reeling out of control and so I made a list of where each gift was. I think you are looking at about 15 of them here.