In The Ass

Bad Ass Coffee in Tolleson, Arizona

How appropriate that the name of the coffee shop in which I should finally find space to sit down has in it the word “ASS.” It was just the other day I was writing about my wife’s colon, and now I find myself in the far southwest of Phoenix, actually, a small city called Tolleson, which is out near Goodyear and Avondale. I hate this part of the Valley of the Sun. Who am I kidding? I hate almost everything in the Phoenix area.

Sorry, Bad Ass Coffee of Hawaii, for dragging your image into this as I don’t dislike you at all; on the contrary, I’m thrilled you are out here and open so I can sit down and get a bit of writing in while my wife is nearby visiting with a friend.

So, which axe are you grinding here today, John? An age-old missive that is tired, worn, and just a lot more of the grumpy old man shtick I show up with on possibly too many occasions. Hmmm, I’ll try to mix this one up here; what’s eating me today are those white people who are my age and older, especially those who live in these predominantly white neighborhoods where their generically bland existences seem to crawl right up in my ass to fester and cause me groan-worthy discomfort.

Yes, I’m that judgmental, and yes, it’s all based on appearances. These people who should be metaphorical books of at least some depth are badly written half-wit passages that hardly qualify as works in progress as much they are brief paragraphs and broken sentences of insipidness. If you are wondering how I come to that conclusion, it’s writ large on their doltish faces. Whoa there, why all the hostility?

This is not the only city I’ve lived in, not the first state, nor the only country. I think I know something about diversity and attitudes as worn by faces that offer a glimpse into the local attitudes. Just as you can’t venture into a concert by Napalm Death and confuse the attendees with those who were supposed to see the nearby Rick Astley show, you can see in people’s faces their tensions and their whiteness when they are insipid intolerant bigots existing in a sheltered corner of America where their kind congregates.

This all pertains to today’s post title, In The Ass, because that’s just how I feel as I mingle with these turds. You might want to ask, “But can’t you find anything nice to say?” The cold brew here is great, but venting some spleen can be cathartic as I have to reconcile that we still live here in Arizona. To allow my disdain to ferment in my heart and soul would make the pain of being out and amongst these troglodytes a cancer that risks stealing all of my happiness.

I should point out that we live in an economically diverse neighborhood on the edges of wealth, the middle class, and poverty. From Indians and Hispanics to black Americans and Africans, even a smattering of the homeless, we have it all in our little corner of Phoenix. From our area, I can easily make my way over to a part of the valley that’s becoming a Little Asia kind of place.

How do I address the question of why I think I can see this in the faces of people I pass? What could it be in the morphology of their appearance that screams, “I’m a small-minded backwoods fascist that would join the Whitey Jihadists to purify the world if you show me where to sign up.” Is it arrogance? Their haircuts? Hats? To be honest, I’d have to rely on my intuition after encountering this type of bulwark for stupidity after so many years.

Fortunately, I don’t have to shoulder this perspective alone: Bernard Stiegler, in his book, The Age of Disruption: Technology and Madness in Computational Capitalism, talks of the “Non-Inhuman Human,” well, I initially couldn’t quite understand the concept behind this description so I turned to Reddit and the r/askphilosophy subreddit, endeavoring to figure out what precisely this non-inhuman human is. Just today, someone shared this explanation: Human humans [Stiegler refers to them as “non-inhuman human”] safeguard (by transforming) knowledge, values, and other noetic things by reflecting on the consequences of their actions. Actions take place through technical objects (real objects, concepts, social organizations, institutions, etc.), which means the way “human humans” reflect is by criticizing their technical creations. All this noetic activity is a condition to the evolution of the species, keeping it from extinction… “Inhumans humans” [on the other hand] do not do this, and their actions are plainly stupid, destroying knowledge on a massive level. 

It is precisely these inhuman humans against whom I rail.

Cruel Wealth and Cool Stupidity

Musk Bezos Gates

Who do we hate more today, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, or Bill Gates? Let me spin the bottle so the universe can figure it out. Seeing how Elon Musk was just named Time magazine’s Man Of The Year and that he’s been flirting with being the richest person on earth, he’s the man of the hour to hate. Right behind him, though, is Jeff Bezos, who recently sat by playing with his rocket while 6 of his employees died in an Amazon warehouse during a tornado. And, of course, Bill Gates will always be hated because he’s Bill Gates, who started us down this path of cruel wealth while he piloted his Borg ship on a path that would end up delivering his 5G chips into our veins.

Does anyone out there really care that 100 people a day are murdered in America, that 100 people a day die in car accidents, or that 57 elderly people die prematurely every day due to poor care at private equity-owned senior care facilities? No to all of the above, but when six people die at a Jeff Bezos-operated facility (never mind that he’s not been the CEO since June), he’s still at fault due to his untaxed billions in cash that pour from the spigot on his bald head.

Why, America? How and why are we this stupid?

The wealth created by the fundamental shifts in the economy and technology benefits shareholders, workers, and the entire global economy as they change the very way we work and exchange our labor for food, shelter, education, health care, and transportation. But that means nothing when you have a wealthy class of propagandists who need to focus the public’s ire against a select few who become the lightning rods to attract the anger that might otherwise be directed at the entire ruling class that has failed to find a vision for the direction of humanity.

So, if you are a billionaire, you need to be prepared to have the weight of the world thrown upon your shoulders, such is the price for your fat wallet.

But John, it’s more than that. If these fat cats were properly taxed, I’d feel compensated and would be able to luxuriate in the knowledge that they paid their fair share, which would ultimately lift me out of my current difficult financial situation.

Consider this: the average rent for an apartment in the United States is $1,124 per month. Now, take the combined wealth of Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Bill Gates (the majority of that wealth is mostly locked up in stock), which is approximately $535 billion (a considerable but fluctuating amount), and force them to divest themselves of every bit of stock they own. Your share of those three’s vast wealth would be $1,623 after dividing it between the 329.5 million people who live on our shores. Then again, if you are a homeowner whose average monthly mortgage payment is $1,487, you’d only have $136 left of your share after making a single payment, but wait, after the average electricity payment of $114 per household there’s hardly enough of your share of these billionaire’s wealth to buy your family a meal at your local fast-food drive-thru.

It seems that NOBODY considers or cares that the combined market value of the companies these three people started is now worth $5 trillion and that the $4.5 trillion owned by the public and other companies is wealth shared by those who are invested in these people’s ideas. How about these armchair experts/haters think about what would happen to the price of Tesla’s, Microsoft’s, and Amazon’s stock if their three founders were to suddenly dump all of their stock? Those valuations of $5 trillion could be reduced to not much more than $1 trillion, which to the average person would still be seen as a lot of money for sure, but…

Jeff Bezos’ stock is currently worth $3,400 a share, but if he were forced to sell his 53,000,000 shares, the price would likely tank down to below $1,000 a share in a fire sale, he’d still net over $50 billion as the price was run down, but you’d destroy the investment of all those who’d invested in Amazon and paid more than $1,000 a share.

Now extrapolate that to the fortunes of Apple, Google, Facebook, Twitter, and the other tech titans, and let’s make them all pay their fair share, strip them of their untaxed stock wealth, and just yank some $8 trillion of wealth from investors so we can recoup $1 trillion from these billionaire despots.

I hope you see where this has gone; we are idiots and collectively have no real idea how much of anything functions on the scales that things operate. The wealthy certainly know this as they are smart enough to offer us the sacrificial lambs that can easily insulate themselves against the crackpots and stupidity of the angry horde. Just keep Bezos, Musk, Gates, and Zuckerberg in the headlines so we don’t blame the larger part of corporate America, our politicians, or the media that feeds this gas-lighting of the sheep.

Welcome to your place in the perpetual Rube Goldberg machine whereby, sharing your bias and uninformed opinions, you contribute to the greater stupidity of everyone around you just as though you were but one more piece of the machine that dazzles our imagination as everything is toppled in a succession of cascading disinformation, ignorance, and inability to see our own intellectual shortcomings.

Today’s Image: Copyright © 2001-2021 Cluley Associates Limited

Caroline’s Geburtstag

Caroline Wise in Phoenix, Arizona

After taking Caroline the 28 miles from home to the Korean corndog joint in Mesa for her birthday last year it seemed impossible to top that and so I didn’t even try. As a matter of fact, we were standing in the kitchen this morning when she suggested that I should treat her to breakfast in bed which had me asking her, why should I do that? “Well, how about because it’s my birthday?” Oops.

We’d talked of her upcoming birthday multiple times over the previous weeks and while I knew that I’d do absolutely nothing for it, I wasn’t supposed to outright forget it on the very day it was occurring. Even seeing the missed call from her father and stepmother that had arrived at 4:30 in the morning to my phone (the ringer was turned off because who wants to be woken at such an hour) didn’t trigger me that he might have been calling for his daughter’s birthday. So with that embarrassing stuff out of the way, on to the rest of the day.

I did end up making breakfast for her, even her coffee, but she wasn’t able to indulge it while horizontal as her sister and brother-in-law were Skyping her to wish those kinds of greetings that typically show up on this type of day. Afterward, she phoned her father to return his call, and then it was on to her mom Jutta. Regarding my mother-in-law, she’d get to enjoy celebrating Caroline’s birthday twice today as just a few hours after she and her daughter hung up the first call, Jutta called us as she had just remembered that today is Caroline’s birthday. Such is the memory of someone mired in dementia.

With family phone calls out of the way, it was time for us to grab some lunch, which I nearly forgot as well until Caroline stopped me and asked about going to Otro Cafe, a New Mexican inspired place near downtown Phoenix that we’d agreed just the day before to visit. Sheesh, where’s my head? I’d like to claim it’s stuck in a daze from staring at this face I find absolutely delightfully beautiful, but that would be an easy copout, though I do love staring at it. If anything at all, I’d say that with the creatures of habit thing that’s happened to a large extent this past two years, if we are home, we are likely staying put and doing a bunch of whatever.

However, that bunch of whatever is about to get shifted to the point of relentless change. John, what do you mean? Well, Caroline’s 54th year promises to be extraordinarily busy if we can maintain the intention to follow through with a travel itinerary I’ve been working on that starts soon. How soon? Real soon with the first trip taking us back to the Bosque del Apache National Wildlife Refuge south of Socorro, New Mexico, where our fetish for birds, lots of birds, is able to be satisfied in much the same way as llamas eating hands.

Better Unseen

Colonoscopy

Ask me tongue-in-cheek why I didn’t blog about your colonoscopy, and I’ll just go ahead and do just that. What kind of question was that coming from my wife? Really, you want the world to see the inside of your lower intestine? Fine, here it is.

Caroline was the first of us to go ahead and finally get a colonoscopy. I, on the other hand, have been leery, and it turns out that it was for no good reason. Well, let’s condition that because my idea of a colonoscopy came out of the ancient past where doctors, using something approaching the size of a thermos, required the patient be put under general anesthesia due to the trauma of having a giant tool shoved up your pooper, so they could look around trying to find the damage done by a poor diet. Then there were the stories I picked up before I was seven years old, where adults spoke about the horrors wrought by the laxatives and their foul taste. These scars have lasted a long time.

It turns out I was all wrong, at least as far as the procedure is concerned in 2021. This, though, begs the question, why didn’t one of my doctors ask me over these past eight years just what it was that was making me hesitant to have someone deep-diving past my rectum? Shouldn’t they have known that someone my age could have known of the process prior to modern medicine? Then again, I can also ask myself why didn’t I just Google it?

I have a great answer to that last question. Google any malady or medical procedure, and your ad stream automagically is transformed into a modern-day pharmacopeia where every corner of a webpage is there to encourage the reader to diagnose ailments and formulate strategies to deal with illness: poof, yer a doctor!

Well, it turns out that the device is no bigger than a finger and is able to probe the 5 feet of the colon without discomfort, but then again, what could be uncomfortable under the influence of propofol? This means that I can finally belly-up (or would that be “butt-up”?)  and get those nether regions beyond the b-hole checked out and photographed like Caroline’s seen above.

As for how did things look up, that squishy wet pink tube normally filled with creamy brown poop regarding my wife? She had one tiny polyp identified by item #3, a seriously small polyp, and doesn’t have to come in for a return visit for 5-10 years.

Finally, this is a milestone in my writing as while I’ve written about Oregon, Yellowstone, Europe, and other places many times, this is the first time I’ve ever noted anything at all about the interior of my wife’s bottom and for the casual reader, maybe you hope this is the last…until I write about my own.

r/askphilosophy

John Wise and Caroline Wise

Today, I offered my two cents on a question posted on Reddit in the /askphilosophy subreddit:

“Could constantly learning new things be a way to give meaning to life, or is it merely an illusion that we are trying to create?”

I cannot offer insight into studies or schools of thought regarding the question, but I can answer with regard to the insights gained by my wife and me, who are approaching our 60s. Both of us constantly delve into often difficult/complex areas of learning as we’ve noticed that for us, this is a form of play but, more importantly, a way of discovery. At various points along our journey together, we were asked what the “secret” to our happiness is, and what I came up with was that the intensity of exploration experienced at the beginning of our relationship never relented.

This led me to look at those around us who were falling into pre-relationship behaviors because the deep discovery and exploration of the partner that arrives with the early days of falling in love, were waning. Moving into routines, many seem to grow bored or unsatisfied with things.

On the other hand, we read a lot; as a matter of fact, when we travel by car, my wife, who doesn’t like to drive, reads to me. We do not listen to audiobooks; we’ve tried, but I insisted we turn away from them as I’d already grown familiar with my wife’s voice, and so it became the preferred choice of what I wanted to hear as we’d drive the 600 miles between locations. We also have hobbies that are able to evolve and require new skills. Add to this mix that we don’t watch television, play video games, or invest decades in the same activities we were doing 30 years ago, and the world seems to stay new.

We are not rich, we share a car, rent a small apartment, do not have university educations and yet we vacation between 3 and 10 times a year (some of those travels might only be a weekend out of state). We have time and the means to explore various cuisines such as Korean, Burmese, Thai, Indian, Chinese, various European, and of course American. I’m sharing the info about food as it, too, lends itself to the objective of constant learning.

I cannot tell you that this constant learning for the two of us has definitively given us greater meaning or happiness, but I am certain that without this “play” (when I was a child, we referred to discovery, exploring, and learning by the word “play”) we would be fearful of the situation that might curtail our ability to be in this constant state and maybe that would lead to lack of meaning and diminished happiness.

Happiness may not give meaning to life, but it makes many of its uncertainties bearable, and when learning becomes a constant instead of the inanities of modernity, I find that we have the drive to learn even more in order to discover meaning in that exploration of the unknowns still unfolding in front of us.

Photo of us volunteering during a recent charity food packing event held nearby.

Deep In The Hoodoos

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Nineteen degrees (-7 Celsius) is cold by most people’s measure, but that’s what greeted Brinn and me as we took our things to the car before breakfast, a car frosted over with ice. Lodging, dinner, and breakfast, were nothing of special note unless noting relative mediocrity is worthy, which I suppose with even having written this made it all noteworthy.

Looking at this overview at Sunset Point on the first steps down the Navajo Loop, it’s easy to be caught breathless by the magnitude of spectacular beauty, and yet the services surrounding this natural phenomenon are heartless utilities of banality built for people of no discernment. I do not mean to imply that I want to see 5-star luxury and Michelin-starred restaurants, but what is here is a testament to the fact that people with low expectations stay in the area. What’s missing? Reasonably priced glamping, cabins with barbecues along with a nearby grocery trading in at least a few fineries, restaurants that don’t serve the lowest common denominator foods pulled from SAD (Standard American Diet).

I looked into renting an e-bike for a half-day, and WTF? The local rental place wanted $59 for a half-day, which is only $4 cheaper than a 3-day rental up on Rügen Island in Germany, right on the Baltic Sea (the cost for a full-day rental was only $22). Also, the battery range for e-bikes in Germany (we also rented in Frankfurt) is 50 to 62 miles on a charge, while the range for e-bikes at this Bryce location is 25 to 40 miles, and the path from the shop to the park is 17 miles in one direction, so maybe you’ll have enough power for the roundtrip.

Then it dawns on me: only provide mediocre services so the nature of the place appears even more valuable compared to the ridiculous expense and horrid culinary experience had in the nearby town. Okay, enough lament; on with the beauty.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

In an instant, the affront to my sense of the aesthetic is washed away like the soil that at one time must have surrounded these hoodoos. Spires, a.k.a. hoodoos, are what we came for, and now was the time to immerse ourselves in amongst them instead of just standing over their grandeur, snapping a few photos, and moving down the road.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Half of the Navajo Loop is closed for the season due to the potential for ice covering the trails on Wall Street as that part of the path is known. Well, for me this was a great deal because this meant a new trail for me. On a previous trip, Caroline and I had taken the Wall Street leg of Navajo Loop and continued on the Queens Garden Trail to Sunrise Point.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Little did I realize back on our previous hikes (I believe we’ve done this twice before, but I’m sure Caroline will have the better memory, so look for her note – Nah, I think you’re right – C.) just how different this branch of the trail would appear. It’s immediately and abundantly clear that, after more than a dozen years since our last visit, I must plan a return visit for my wife and me and stay more than a half-day so we can hike the Peek-A-Boo trail we’ve never taken.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

It falls on my head as though Thor’s Hammer had struck me: because we had taken the other side of the Navajo Trail, we’d only seen this feature from above, and that other side of the trail doesn’t offer anything at all like this view. By the way, this rock feature is known as Thor’s Hammer.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Also, regarding my head, but also my center of gravity that appears to smack dab in the crack of my torso found at that southerly spot of my backside, my sense of vertigo appears to grow worse with age. The unseen photo down this canyon that is on my right, just out of sight, is a series of steep switchbacks that are triggering this fear of heights.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Then, down near the bottom of the trail, it appears that we are on nothing more than a common forest trail. Oh, while verifying a few things for this post, I saw the Fairy Land Loop Trail is the longest trail in the park at 7.8 miles and would seem to imply that I’ll have to carve out an additional day for Caroline and me if we are to include that one too. If we were to wait another dozen or more years to return to this park, I’d have just hit my  70s, and I can’t be all that certain I’d be able to knock that out. Do things while you can is my motto, all the things!

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

See human for scale!

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

And before you know it, we are on our way out. Sadly, this is not a ride at Disneyland with some people mover ready to carry us back up the 47 stories it’ll take to reach the rim again. Come to think about it; I’m happy this is not owned by Disneyland with rides where the masses could crowd this spectacle of nature with minimal effort.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah

Not the best photo of Brinn I’ve taken, but it’s certainly the best I’ve ever taken that includes his shadow.

By the time we were getting off the trail, all we could do was drive, drive, drive, as we were looking to get back to Phoenix earlier rather than later. Okay, we did stop for a slice of pie at that “Ho-Made” joint called Thunderbird Restaurant at Mt. Carmel Junction in southern Utah, but after lunch, we were in agreement that pie would have to wait for a future visit, which is just as well as Brinn was here with me, not the person he’s in love with and of course I wasn’t here with Caroline so his pie experience will have to wait.

Sure, we were in a hurry, but could I really skip taking any photos on the way home? Nope, and so the world’s largest dream catcher is my stand-in for representing our path back to Phoenix, which is the same route we just took yesterday on our way up.

This concludes our quick two-day jaunt covering 900 miles of sightseeing and Brinn’s first-ever visit to Utah.