The Blank Page

Blank Page

The blank page is an awful thing to witness; it is devoid of substance and lacks meaning, and the interpretation of it is not much more than seeing a blank slate. For the sheet of white to garner the reader’s interest, one must commit to filling it with something that pulls the reader’s eyes forward to explore the thoughts of the person who left the breadcrumbs. Due to the limitations of language, there will be long sequences of machinations that may or may not reveal things of interest. So, why do the streams of words that flow from some fingers carry travelers to new and interesting places while someone else expending an equal effort fails to engage the reader’s curiosity in quite the same way?

Words create images painted in colors and characters that satisfy the dreams not yet imagined in hungry minds yearning for meaning. But, meaning is an abstraction of current conditioning that allows the person to navigate those things at the margin of perception. We cannot write about hobbits, gnomes, sprites, and fairies without the folklore that allows us to consider their presence. Dinosaurs, monsters, aliens, and the like are possible because we’ve seen their artistic renditions and, in some instances, proof of their existence due to their fossilized skeletons.

So, when the storyteller wants to bring others on a journey into the unknown, it is their responsibility to architect the structures that render the invisible horizon into sequences of moments painted in language. As the musician borrows from the palette of tones to create melodies, the writer will borrow letters and words that must sing while simultaneously offering images and landscapes that are meaningful enough to become a working narrative or even new folklore in our memory while certain passages take on musical-like qualities and play as a soundtrack giving meaning to our gathering experiences.

As I go forward creating an ocean to contain this unseen universe, I must remain aware of the need for symbiosis in which disparate parts relate well to one another, just as fish don’t fly to the moon. Cadence should dictate that time is linear, but when it does jump around, it will serve the story to complete a grounding in the subject being familiarized to the reader, who I hope is adopting the story into their own lore. This has me circling back around, wondering what it is precisely about any yarn being spun that takes possession of the brain cells such that it is retained for a lifetime. The answer can only be that readers have found some small or large part of themselves within the pages with wishes that they were part of the story or fortunate that they avoided the situation. Does this imply that what’s written is either fantasy or a lesson?

How could it be anything else? Well, the easy answer there is that it can be both, although the reader may not yet have enough knowledge to glean where the learning is, or might they be so learned that they understand that there is no fantasy but only potentialities? — Written October 2021

Obituary for a Pair of Socks

Handmade Socks

Yesterday, this pair of socks that Caroline informed me is less than a year old developed a large hole under the ball of one of my feet. They are unrepairable as the darning stitches that would be required to bridge the hole would be too uncomfortable for my highly sensitive feet. The yarn was picked up in Santa Cruz, California, last May 4th, which means Caroline just finished these within the last 6 months. Maybe I wore them too often or it’s possible they didn’t have enough nylon spun into the yarn? In any case, they weren’t as durable as others. There’s really no way of knowing, but they need to be put aside with great sadness. We are considering keeping one and adding it to our Tibetan prayer flags that hang over a sliding door. When socks are handmade for you, it’s absolutely tragic when a pair must go away.

Random

Butterfly

Do not look for that thing we believe will be found in love before you have learned something about who you are, and don’t believe that sense of knowing can be had before you start to approach your mid-20s. Learning and experience must be accumulated just as language or artistic skills must grow over time. We are not born with fully developed skills for using words or paint brushes; we cultivate them gradually and take influence from the many interactions that must occur before we are able to share competency. The same holds true as we begin the journey of exploring our emergent adult selves. We cannot commit to a person early if we are to reach our complex potential that must grow and evolve. Who are we, what are we capable of, and what do we want to know that we don’t know yet? Those answers must be found as we traverse the space within us; they are only rarely delivered by someone else. Just because you watch a story about a fairy princess, you do not magically become one, and just because you want love, there’s no guarantee that what someone tells you is love will be, in fact, love.

There are people who desire to please others, hoping for love in return, and there are those who only take from others as they themselves never learned to give. It is only through giving that we begin to flirt with love. Do not fool yourself by giving your all that the recipient will be enlightened by your efforts if you’ve known them to be takers. People who only take do not love themselves or anyone else; they are exploring self-hate that cynically has them telling and showing others exactly what they want to hear or see so the taker can get what they think they want. The problem is that the taker has no real idea what they want as they are lost, blinded by an inability to feel for others.

Our investment in discovering ourselves requires traveling a path that only rarely do we have the opportunity to share with a kindred spirit. Often alone, the journey into discovery demands we peel the onion of life and suffer the tears of anguish, which brings forth the cliched maxim of “What does not kill me makes me stronger.”

Do not look for affirmation from others; you will not find validation from them that only comes from within.

As we transition to our teenage years there are those of us who experience for the first time ideas of loneliness; we are no longer nestled tightly within our family. We start to identify who we wish to be. Narcissists never grow up and accept this loneliness or isolation, and so they clamor to keep people around and dependent upon them so that they never need to feel alone or by themselves.

The Trash of Nostalgia

Pieter Bruegel the Elder - The Ass in the School

Pioneers, inventors, wanderers, and people steeped in hard work helped define a nation in a previous age. Nowaday,s this has been supplanted by superficial caricatures of clowns that are themselves creations of illusions. While people are relics with little utility to a society that is possessed by fragmentary citizens honed from the trash of nostalgia and trivia.

Do not conflate nostalgia and trivia with real knowledge, as a grab bag of nonsense regarding sports, celebrities, viral videos, and video games hardly replaces literature, philosophy, science, and theology. Fashion belies the idea that someone’s external expression is somehow relevant to the advancement of our species. Yet, due to our utter lack of direction as people of the United States, we now rely on the appearance of things to wholly define one’s place in the natural order.

It is as though we’ve reversed our trajectory into the future, regressing to the age where one’s display of face paint, seashells, necklace of trophies, or types of animal skins worn proffer an adequate positioning of our standing in the social hierarchy.

Fractured media sources play into this by delivering fragments of nonsense construed as specific cultural knowledge but presenting us with superfluous trash masquerading as contemporary relevance. Do we as a society want more than that? The answer I see writ large on the foreheads of those I encounter is a resounding NO. We are seemingly happy to be lost in our trivialized compendium of all things golf, Pokemon, celebrity du jour, fad exercise, or scandal rocking the tabloids that we find trending on social or mass media.

The cliché that we are becoming a nation of idiots is played for laughs but actually applies to the vast majority – which do not realize this includes them. In my estimation (or arrogance), I believe this concerns almost 95% of those I am likely to encounter on any given day, week, or month. I move from poor to wealthy environments and rarely am able to claim to be witness to intellectual activity. Sure, I listen in on savvy investors making money, real estate deals, and people plotting their next vacation or sending their children off to university, but the underlying mindset is tone-deaf to matters of societal cohesion beyond obtuse biases that often fuel hate.

Without a working broad spectrum of knowledge and little logic backed by critical thinking, my fellow citizens wreak of posturing imbeciles while whatever hope I’ve had of finding inspiration and mentorship from those around me has faded like the sun over Seattle in January. How does one find community in a society of idiots when the ambitions of the individual are met with indifference to big-picture issues and sharing well-reasoned wisdom doesn’t exist? Instead of being embraced in the community, we are labeled nerds and geeks to be relegated to the margin as difficult while being perceived as awkward and or anti-social.

Somewhere along the road of advancement in the United States, knowledge became a weapon characterized by showing off and appearing arrogant. The economic reality of capitalism requires rewarding of smart, but it should happen off-camera on the margin and in the shadows. Should great success come your way, the scrutiny of who you are and the hope for your demise will run rife in our population of misfits who thrive on seeing others ultimately suffer worse fates than they perceive themselves to be suffering.

Somewhere in the back of my head, maybe in the front, sit Alan Watts, Terence McKenna, Nietzsche, Baudrillard, Baudelaire, Bukowski, Burroughs, Dickens, Ram Dass, Russell, Dawkins, Deutsch, E.O. Wilson, Fortey, Foucault, Reich, Canetti, Marcuse, and Bataille. They inform my search for a voice.

500,000 years ago, we started making stone tools; 30,000 years ago, we learned to work with clay; 12,000 years ago, we learned how to farm; 10,0000 years ago, we learned to work with copper; and 6,000 years ago, we learned how to work with bronze. Today, we are reduced to social media and empty posturing so that a new religion called consumption and conspicuous display can rule over us. The digital tools we are using are the new religious icons that adorn our minds, occupying them with thoughts of our electronic Jesus, Buddha, etc.

Out of The Real and Into Omega Mart

Highway 93 north of Las Vegas, Nevada

We wake to the blissful idea that there are 100 miles of this ahead of us before we have to encounter the mega aggression of what it is to drive in the city of Las Vegas. When I think of the horror of driving in Los Angeles, I should keep in mind that even on a Sunday morning in Vegas, the people in this place of broken dreams are driving with incredible contempt and regret for their poor decisions and, consequently, they care little about others who must die like they already have done inside.

Highway 93 north of Las Vegas, Nevada

In retrospect, as in when I actually got to writing this post, it would be these V-shaped electricity poles that would be the main attraction of the day. To get this photo, we had to walk about a half mile across raw desert, and the payoff was well worth it. It was fascinating to see that these poles that would be mostly out of eyeshot of us humans were wrapped in black steel as nothing more than a decorative element. Something else drew us in: while we simply assumed that guy-wires were stabilizing the V configuration of the towers, it was difficult to see them from the road; out here, it all became clear.

Highway 93 north of Las Vegas, Nevada

I could also now grab a shot of the mountains behind the powerlines that were obscured before.

Highway 93 north of Las Vegas, Nevada

We drove next to this desert art installation for miles before realizing that if we didn’t leave with photographic proof of their aesthetic qualities, we’d be forever disappointed in the lost opportunity to share this with others and prove to ourselves that such things really do exist.

Highway 93 north of Las Vegas, Nevada

We were about to drop into Las Vegas where we’ll visit Omega Mart from Meow Wolf before stopping for lunch at Chengdu Taste for Szechuan culinary treats. From big nature into the maelstrom that is Sin City is a jolt better left to those looking for riches, sex, drunken or stoned debauchery, and confirmation that they are living the American Dream.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

The reality from my perspective is that this city is a nightmare of neon, DayGlo, fake body parts, lawyers, guns, 24-hour everything, weed, Barry Manilow, and a giant golden dildo of a hotel emblazoned with the word “Trump” across the top that for some is a Great Attractor while for me it acts as a megaphone blaring, “GTFO of here!” But we are not here to bash the place we’ve avoided visiting together since 2004; we are here for Omega Mart above all else.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

After visiting Meow Wolf’s House of Eternal Return in Santa Fe, New Mexico, we’ve been looking forward to visiting their other locations, the one over in Denver, Colorado, and this one right here. We were actually a little confused visiting this Meow Wolf location today because once you find the enclave pocketed next to the freeway, you are confronted with a parking lot aimed more at those arriving by something like Lyft, Uber, or taxi. You enter a giant warehouse-like building called Area 15, which is a blacked-out neon mall/nightclub and is probably hopping after dark, but here in the morning, it’s family time.

Caroline Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Knowing the drill from our summer visit to Santa Fe, we knew to check all doors and everything else that might act as a passage to somewhere else. With that in mind, we entered through a cooler and were genuinely excited to discover what lies beyond the cool passage.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Blam, Alex Grey type of projection-mapped irregularly shaped walls greet us in a great room. This is promising.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Oh, this is nice, an ornate skeleton in a glass coffin. We are intrigued, and our excitement is growing.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Should we pass back into reality? Not yet.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Hints of the Santa Fe location and the draw that there is yet a lot to be discovered.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

But too quickly, we are again in the main room, and while the projection mapping is great, it seems like we circled back here far too quickly.

Caroline Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Okay, now we are on the right path, this hidden tunnel will certainly bring us to an area that is not obviously part of what we are able to see from various spots on the main floor.

Caroline Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

I’m starting to get creeped out, not by the environment but by the number of observers/security personnel that are all over the place. What does this presence say about the visitors? Taking photos without them is no easy feat. At this point, we are still enjoying the ambiance and scale of things, and the tunnel stairs gave us hope that the space will be bigger and more intricate than our first observations have alluded to.

Color-pulsing flowers with shifting hues were nice, but a theme is becoming apparent; we are moving through large installation spaces in an almost traditional museum setup of walls and art pieces instead of feeling like we are in something immersive as we did in Santa Fe.

This should be the reminder, we are in Las Vegas. As much as I want to be at Meow Wolf as I first experienced it, we are in a city we abhor for the type of people it attracts. Ironically, back in the late 20th century, when we still were intrigued by this place, we despised the hell found in Laughlin, Nevada, popular with the elderly and bikers, but by now, well into the 21st century, I have the same disdain for the type of person Vegas attracts. Maybe when Earth forked 50,000 years ago, I landed in the highly discontiguous zone of grumpy assholes destined to despise the masses.

Caroline Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

Too much of a reliance on video, in my opinion, which I can only figure appeals to the dim-witted who are more accustomed to being fed information via a screen with moving pictures than having to rely on deciphering what objects of art might mean. This particular part of the exhibit did allow Caroline and me to take a selfie that is well outside the ordinary of how we typically shoot them.

Caroline Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

More video. There are a lot of videos and screens for people to feel comfortable with.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

On the other hand, I want more of this.

Caroline Wise and John Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

This was a nice, albeit slightly confusing, use of technology: it appears a motion-sensitive detector sees that a person or people are in front of the display and triggers a light; a camera records a burst of video and then plays it back mixed with digital noise that has it looking like we are peering into a universe as overlords or gods.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

And then we arrive in our favorite room of all of Mega Mart, a multi-layered glass and light sculpture that boxes in the walls. It’s always in movement with changes in the quality of the light on different panels within the layering, picking up the light and color giving the illusion that things are animated.

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

There’s something reminiscent of the Monterey Bay Aquarium we recently visited with allusions to the shapes being influenced by sea plants, jellyfish, sea stars, various membranes, eyes, and water bubbles flowing in and through things. While this exhibit is a favorite, it’s really being hammered on us that we are entering relatively empty spaces with art on the walls, and while it’s not like anything else we’ve ever seen, there seems to be something missing in comparison to our immersive experience just a couple of months prior at the House of Eternal Return.

Caroline Wise and John Wise at Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

We are back in the main shopping area of Mega Mart, and yes, those are purple tears of disappointment at having spent $118 to be here for only a bit more than an hour. While we enjoyed most of the things we saw, the place has the vibe of being here for drunken visitors who require larger spaces that are both easy to clean and facilitate larger groups moving through without damaging fragile art, such as what we saw in Santa Fe. There is a lack of intricate detail and too much of a reliance on video screens and projections; there are not enough hidden passages. There are half a dozen doors that have signs that say, “Nope” and appear to either be unfinished rooms, rooms under refurbishment, or simply closed as they proved incompatible with the type of people that visit this location. Whatever the circumstances, nothing was offered about why this experience was so expensive and so brief.

[It should also be noted that all of the Meow Wolf installations have storylines and clues that visitors can attempt to discover and decipher. However, unlike Santa Fe, Las Vegas offers visitors an “interactive experience” for an extra charge. Since it wasn’t obvious to us what the value of that would be, we decided against it (we didn’t try to “solve the puzzles” in Santa Fe either and had a fabulous time just roaming the exhibit rooms). I suspect that the cards allow visitors to interface with the various terminals to get “clues.” It looked as if most of the other visitors were clustering around every conceivable computer screen (instead of looking at the artwork) as if we were moving through a fancy internet cafe, and that was a bit of a turn-off. – Caroline]

Meow Wolf's Mega Mart in Las Vegas, Nevada

In a sense, I feel like this display in Mega Mart is a comment about us visitors that says, “You are nothing more than ground meat for the purveyors of this attraction to carve fortunes out of the styrofoam package of you so we may contemplate how our own existence becomes more meaningful than yours.  You are reduced to nothing more than building blocks of our wealth and happiness.”

The funny thing is, we are not so disappointed that we now want to forego a visit to Denver’s Convergence Station by Meow Wolf. We are trying to understand the reasoning behind the Vegas location and maybe a different demographic that is looking for quick experiences on their way through a whirlwind visit to a city that has countless other attractions all vying for the eyeballs and money of people trying to see it all as quick as possible.

Our fantastic lunch of authentic Chinese food at Chengdu Taste made up for the slightly bitter taste left after we so easily dropped $118, but so be it. As we head out of town, we are guessing this might have been our last ever visit to Las Vegas.

Old Trees and Disappearing Glacier

Spent the night in Beaver, Utah, and woke with the rising sun. We were gone before the first rays poked over the horizon. Our idea was to get to Nevada as soon as we could, but obviously not without coffee, and so with only one espresso shop in Beaver, we visited their quite crowded and slow drive-thru. It was a cold 37 degrees (under 3c) when we got in the car at the motel. Our tire pressure sensor came on to inform us of the low pressure, but with nowhere to fill them this early, I figured they’d be okay. We turned on our seat heaters, which was a bit of a surprise when, just the day before, the highs in Phoenix were still clocking in at over 100 Fahrenheit, so this winter routine was way out of the ordinary.

We probably weren’t two sips into those paper cups of java before spotting Penny’s Diner on the western edge of Milford. The idea of a hot breakfast with cups of bad coffee instead of the Americanos we picked up hit a chord with us. Our original idea was to find a spot along the 120-mile drive to the Great Basin National Park to dig into the homemade granola we brought with us, but the call of the greasy potatoes and bacon wasn’t to be resisted, even if it turned out to be mediocre. This combo of traveling and diner is such a classic setup that it easily fits in the adventure and helps round it out, which probably means I’m leaning into some romanticized ideas of nostalgia.

Out on the road after breakfast. The abandoned coffees were still warm, making for a great continuation of our driving chores.

I don’t believe these photos come close to sharing how intriguing the landscape is out here. Not the mountains in the distance, not the amaranth roadside, certainly not the asphalt, and not even the clear blue skies; I’m talking about the desolation. While, on one hand, there’s little to photograph in a bleak landscape, it’s difficult for us not to stop and take it all in, admiring how far our eyes can see without fixing on much of anything between it and miles into the distance.

Further along through the emptiness, we spot what appears to be a solo tree standing above everything else. There are actually a few trees in a tight cluster, a cattle corral and packing area where, at one time, cows were sent off to market, and a tiny two-room house. There’s some light graffiti in the house, but it’s remarkably intact and mostly left alone, and obviously, the trees are still getting enough water, a strange oasis in the middle of nothing.

We were fewer than 10 miles from Nevada when we encountered this little abandoned oasis that sprung up near Clay Spring, which runs through the property. As for the waters still flowing here, they join Lake Creek, which also feeds nearby Pruess Lake. You can be certain I wanted a closer look at the old cabin, but with “No Trespassing” signs posted every 6 feet along the fence, there was no ambiguity regarding the idea of anyone really minding if I wandered around.

Caroline was reading the various stickers on the Nevada state line sign, waiting for me to come over for the obligatory selfie, but I figured that we’d be posting something far more interesting once we got to our destination over in the national park.

We drove right by this old sculpture, thinking it must be similar to one we passed years ago. Well, we were wrong; it is the same sculpture, but it used to be in a different location here in the town of Baker, Nevada. Nearly 20 years ago, on another quick weekend trip that saw us visiting Bryce National Park back in Utah before coming to Great Basin National Park, we stopped at an abandoned building that featured this dinosaur made of old car parts standing guard and took a photo of Caroline sitting with it. Today, that old building is a small market, and this rusting, friendly-looking work of art sits roadside, waiting for extinction as it will one day fade into the earth.

That two-hour drive that stretched into a nearly four-hour sightseeing trip meant we arrived at the national park later than might have been preferred. Arriving at the visitors center, we saw that we were here during the Annual Astronomy Festival, which explains why all the rooms in nearby Baker are sold out, but it also means the park is busier than usual.

This is not the trail we were supposed to be on, but the parking lot at the Bristlecone Pine Glacier Trail was packed. We circled the area half a dozen times before giving up and heading to the overflow lot at the Summit Trail that not only leads hikers to the Wheeler Peak summit but over and around Stella and Teresa Lakes. This detour adds to our hike, but from the looks of things, it’ll be a great addition to the day; plus, we have the added benefit that there’s nobody else on this trail.

The first lake we pass is Stella Lake, with Wheeler Peak up at 13,065 feet (almost 4,000 meters) in the center (I believe) and Doso Doyabi to the left at 12,772 feet. Doso Doyabi is the Shoshone word for White Mountain.

There was much more to this walk just to get this far, and I did take plenty of photos along the trail, but what looks so dramatically different at every turn to warrant photos doesn’t always come through when choosing images to represent the day. As a matter of fact, the 12 miles from the visitors center to the trailhead is worthy of a dozen photos as we rapidly gain elevation over the surrounding basin, but turnoffs are few and my sense of lack of parking ahead had me pressing through. And now that we are on the trail with two primary destinations and two secondary destinations, one of those being the previous lake, we needed to keep our pace moving forward. Be that as it is, I still need to stop and take deep consideration of the anomalies, such as how these mountainsides are eroding.

Secondary destination number two is Teresa Lake.

Our path from the Alpine Lakes Trail Loop has intersected the Bristlecone Pine Glacier Trail and our memories of the place from 19 years ago find nothing of familiarity. The weather might have been poor back on that earlier visit, but it wouldn’t have been so bad that our vision was obscured just 20 feet in front of us.

Right in front of us, off to the right, a bit near the center of this image, is the first primary reason for our visit.

It is this right here, a gnarly example of an ancient bristlecone pine tree. These masters of longevity are considered the oldest living things on earth, and sadly, just minutes before we arrived and from the distance, we saw a group of about eight college-age young adults sitting upon and in this old tree. I think it was in Luke 23:34: where Jesus said, “Fuck ’em, for they do not know what they are doing, best smite them from their perch.”

These sentinels have stood strong on this earth, in some cases for as long as 5,000 years, give or take a few, and only with the arrival of man are they at risk of joining the ranks of those things we are able to extinct. Since the primitive days when people made their earliest attempts at writing, bristlecone pines have survived in some of the harshest conditions where little else succeeds.

Directly upon talus slopes, these trees take hold, and against subsequent encounters with errant rocks that arrive at their feet from above, they hold fast. They’ve survived countless fires, droughts, deep freezes, and even mindless kids crawling upon their arms and roots.  The old bristlecones even contributed to our understanding of ancient early North American cultures when a beam at the Mesa Verde Cliff Dwelling site was dated as having the exact same carbon-14 isotope as some nearby bristlecone pines, allowing researchers to more accurately date when the people of that area built their homes.

What is it within some of us who find greater meaning, depth, and hope for potential in the objects nature has cultivated than in the empty promises of those who swear inspiration from the words found in books such as the bible or those who claim a desire to do right by humanity in the political actions they perform on our behalf? While I appreciate the advances our species has made that brought Caroline and myself to this point in our own lives, allowing us to travel effortlessly to these destinations to record our impressions and experiences, I can’t help but remain aghast at the educational neglect of a majority of those we call mothers, fathers, brothers, and sisters.

These encounters with such grand beauty and profound examples of nature strike at me and have me wondering why there are not more Aldo Leopold’s among us. For those who may not know of him, Aldo Leopold, aside from having written A Sand County Almanac, was a co-founder of The Wilderness Society, which aims to vigilantly protect 112 million acres of America’s wildlands. As much great work as groups such as The Wilderness Society, Friends of the Earth, and the Sierra Club perform, they cannot also educate the blunt stupidity out of a careless society that, by and large, has little concern about protecting these incredible places. I get it; these lands are remote and rarely seen by the masses, but they are the most precious locations remaining that we haven’t fully despoiled.

Writing of the impressions we experienced while among the trees in the mountains of the Great Basin did not happen in situ as we were in the flow of constant movement. I’m back home now, looking at the photos and trying to tap into what I felt that led me to capture the images I did. The effort to draw an intrinsic linguistic gem of inspiration out of my head that might convey the magnitude of delight found when being present in such places requires me to block out my current surroundings and try to reconnect with the moments I was on the trail. In brief spurts, I might find that place, and the words come quickly while at other times, I can stare at an image, lost in the tragic dichotomy of where I’m currently at, typically a busy coffee shop, and feel crushed under the weight of those around me and their stupendously vapid existence.

With the trees, rocks, rivers, sky, sea, stars, animals, and the rest of nature excluding humankind, I can observe their qualities and appreciate their beauty and place within the system of life as far as I can understand it, but with people, I must bear witness to their preoccupation with the nonsense that arises from egos that never graduated beyond that of children. With their pretense of being self-important, I recoil and wish to be in the presence of the natural world, but that is not a luxury easily afforded in the current world order. So we look for balance, and that might be easier found for me if only I were to stop delivering these missives that reflect on the times when life is perfect.

This is where life is perfect. When I turn away from looking at this smiling face of Caroline or my gaze must move on from admiring the pattern found in the seemingly sculpted surface of a tree, my eyes and mind will likely encounter something else of enchanting value, bringing yet more smile to my face that will have me searching for Caroline’s eyes to see if she too has found more awe.

When writing these posts, there comes a moment when I have to walk away from the task at hand to contend with other life obligations (yes, my writing is a life obligation); it is then that I return to joining the stream of being back in real life that I have to escape my self-imposed tunnel vision and get my senses about me as I’m once again swimming against the flow.

Just be. Be like a tree, a stone, or moss, and be here doing the thing that seems to be your purpose. Obviously, many will believe they are doing just that while decorating themselves with the funerary accouterments drawn out of popular consumerist culture instead of rising to the challenge of answering their own list of oblique strategies that might help groom them into finding their humanity as opposed to being tools. There is also the way of the psychedelic where psilocybin, DMT, or maybe under the right circumstances, LSD might open a pathway, but this track of the story needs to happen somewhere else.

Come to think about it; this is the embodiment of the psychedelic as the environment threads its way multi-dimensionally into the earth and out to the sky. Everything here reaches into our eyes, sense of smell, and hearing. We touch cold stone and reach out to ancient life but remain blind to the universe of transactions where root hair cells are absorbing water and nutrients through osmosis while sunlight falls upon leaves where photosynthesis is at work, and all the while, the force of air and water are carving the environment in speeds we’ll never really see unfold. All of this flow of life is what the psychedelic wants to show you, but if you are too fixed in your certainties of how life must be, you’ll never see things for what they are.

If the tree could share a story with you, it might go something like, “I’ve stood here for thousands of years; I’ve watched the heavens above shift with the sands of time. I know fire, ice, and pests. I’m more familiar with our nearby star you’ve named the Sun than any of you can ever hope to comprehend. My existence is not eternal, but I’ve grown to understand the symbiotic relationship between the earth I’m anchored to and the sky I reach for. What will you know after your brief time on this planet we share?”

Dead but not gone as its old roots hold fast, and its arms still welcome the warmth of the sun.

Meanwhile, the rocks of the mountain laugh at the folly of my admiring silly trees that know nothing of longevity. Mountains, they say, truly understand the providence of deep time and would sooner turn to dust over a couple of billion years than sprout and wither in a mere 5,000 years or so.

The tree retorts, “Under the best of circumstances, you send your grains of sand downriver, where they are forever lost when they join other sediments to create the basis for mountains that will one day replace you while we deliver offshoots and seeds that are taken far and wide to cover the lands you once had total dominion over. But don’t be sad as it is from your greatness towering over these lands that the rocks you drop and sediments you lend yourself to is what sustains our lives and has created the basis for the symbiosis we’ve come to enjoy.” The wisdom of nature is commanded by the silence of evolution that conveys an intrinsic beauty pulling those who understand the equation into the desire of wanting to share in this great knowledge.

And then my developing blog post reminds me how it’s like this rocky trail into the thin air found up here over 11,000 feet above the sea or 3,350 meters up high. You see, the path isn’t always clear before you move further along, and it slowly becomes evident. I’m not saying that my writing will do the same thing, though that’s what I aim for. Each step forward risks twisting an ankle and each successive word threatens my ego with exposure of not having really understood the way into writing. No matter, maybe writing is like hiking; you go along on a path uncertain of what you’ll really find, but on occasion, you stumble into something that brings you joy, while at other times, you stand at the precipice of horror, wondering if you should go on. The air thins, and dizziness swirl about in your head. Stop, take a few deep breaths, and continue on your way.

Perhaps the way ahead is frightening? That’s okay. Stop again and turn around. Look at where you’ve come from, and maybe you’ll see that you’ve already surmounted hurdles that make continuing easier than you feared. The adventure is, after all, just a series of steps forward, one foot after the other and, in my case, also one word after the other. An outcome one should seriously fear is when debilitating inertia stops one from ever taking the first step or the next one, and we become frozen in place, be that in front of a TV, a job, a relationship, on the trail, or in mid-sentence.

We were informed that even if we’d stop at the sign that begins the last leg of the hike from the Bristlecone Pine Trail out to the glacier, we’d be offered about as good a look that’s possible without some scrambling over a bunch of scree. Do you see that patch of snow in the center of the photo? That’s what remains of the glacier. I thought this was good enough as it had taken us nearly 4 hours to get out here; we’d soon be in shadows, and we still needed to return to our car before the sun went down. Caroline wanted a closer look, so we continued. The top of the mountain on the right is Wheeler Peak.

At the bottom left of this image, you’ll see a trail leading up and around the foreground debris. It was at the foot of that trail that I didn’t want to go further as it was starting to challenge my sense of exposure. Caroline went up there, but from her perspective, she couldn’t see anything better. Now, the bad news for my wife. That small bit of glacier is the Rock Glacier, while what we thought was some remnant of snow from the past season turns out to have been the bottom of the Wheeler Peak Glacier. If you look at the photo above this one, at the bottom of the cirque, you can see a slightly bluish area going up to the left from the small snow patch. That was the main part of the glacier that we hiked out here for, and we totally neglected looking specifically at that. We didn’t even notice it as being glacial. As for cirque, it is defined as “a half-open steep-sided hollow at the head of a valley or on a mountainside, formed by glacial erosion.”

While I might be mistaken, keep in mind I’m not a geologist; I think this is part of the cirque as it looks like on the back of Doso Doyabi.

We are looking at the remnants of a 560 million-year-old sea where deposits of sand, mud, and limey sediments made of silt and clay mixed with calcium carbonate to create these highly fracturable rocks. As the glaciers retreated, they dragged along tons of these rocks.

Much of our trail this afternoon has been upon that debris left by the disappearing glacier that is also called a moraine. This is Caroline descending the segment I referenced earlier, where part of the trail was too exposed for my sensibilities.

A whole forest of bristlecone pines, maybe we could call it a murder of trees? [I prefer “thunder of trees,” actually – Caroline] In the background is the Great Basin that stretches from the Sierra Nevada Range in California, such as in Death Valley, where we were in January, over to the Wasatch Range in Utah, where we spent the 4th of July. The basin, as I understand things, never drained to the ocean and instead was always an inland sea, remnants can be found at the Great Salt Lake in Utah and the nearby intermittent Sevier Lake that shows up occasionally about 40 miles east of here. Today, I learned that these types of bodies of water are referred to as endorheic, meaning they do not flow outside of themselves, just like the Salton Sea over in California.

A great article that helped me learn about some of this can be found here.

We’re on our way back down the trail with an impulse to revisit all the trees we passed on our way up, not because we failed to see them but because there’s a hope that we’ll see something more. In my reasonable mind, I know that I cannot merge with these trees, and I cannot see some deeply hidden truths within them; all the same, I want a greater exchange with the nature I’m visiting so that it might continue to travel with me when I’m no longer present.

Goodbye, Bristlecone Pine. Should I never see you again, I wish you a continued existence for another 1,000 years as you outlive all 7.98 billion people alive today and the next many billions that will follow over the ensuing hundreds of years.

We are reaching our car again and are looking forward to sitting down. From this point, our car is just behind me on the right. The trail we hiked out on is over near it and travels away from the road to the two lakes we visited earlier; they both lay below the bright, ragged mountainside on the right of the photo. The trail then swung around the base of that part of the mountain and went right between Doso Doyabi, the peak to the left, and up towards Wheeler Peak, the high point on the right. Again, I may be mistaken, but the very top of the glacier might be seen to the right of the center of this photo. Should we ever return to the Great Basin National Park, we’ll have to be here early in the morning when the rising sun illuminates the cirque and the glacier nestled up under it.

Driving down the mountain, we started considering the option of sticking around for the Astronomy Festival and so we stopped at the visitors center, but it was closed. Drats, not only wouldn’t Caroline be able to drop off her Junior Ranger booklet, but we couldn’t learn more about the evening’s events. With no phone signal out here, that wasn’t an option either, so we decided to hit the Loneliest Road in America, Highway 50, and make our way over to Ely, Nevada, to secure a room for the night. A funny thing happened on the road to Ely; we turned south on Highway 93, certain we’d find a room in that direction and better position ourselves for tomorrow’s trip home, thus skipping the Astronomy Festival. Had we had phone signal prior to reaching the 93 and could have contacted a motel in Ely, we likely would have stayed and then returned to the national park in the evening. As it was, we felt we had a great experience so far and decided that a shorter drive home tomorrow was desirable.

Confident and content that we’d made the right decision, we drove off into the sunset. It was right about here on the road that we felt a certain sense of familiarity that required a stop and photo to compare to a previous trip if this were, in fact, the same place we’d captured years before. Click here to compare for yourself; we’re pretty sure it’s the same spot just from a slightly different position on the road.

No, this is not a great photo with so much shadow on the foot of the mountain, but I’m posting this as it felt like we’d already been driving for more than 45 minutes when a sign pointed out that this is Wheeler Peak, did it really take this long to get to the other side? By the way, we still didn’t have a phone signal.

When we finally started seeing signal again, we found out that all three lodging options in Caliente were sold out, and so were the other places between us and Alamo, Nevada. I mention Alamo as that’s where we secured the last room they had, which, if they hadn’t had a room, would have meant we’d be driving all the way to Las Vegas, another 104 miles south.

We scored at the Sunset View Inn with a night in the Safari Room. Before I knew about the extra decorative touches here, Caroline texted me about her surprise regarding our room, then she slid open the window as I was still taking care of some things at the car, and with a beaming smile, she told me I had to come over and see this place immediately. As I peered in, the first thing that grabbed me was the lion-themed bedspreads. Getting into the room and seeing the animal prints on the light switches, the painted claw marks in the closet, and the elephant-themed towel holders, the character of the otherwise non-descript roadside motel started to elicit joy. Each room at this inexpensive outpost has a different theme! Hopefully, on a return visit, we’ll snag the underwater-themed room. If these kinds of touches out in the middle of absolute nowhere don’t put a smile on your face, nothing will.