Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 15

Missouri

In the light of day, the room could be called old, rustic, or plain old crappy. Mom thinks Psycho is more fitting. We have concluded Weaubleau is pronounced WeBlow, and we wanna blow this town. Before we even emerged from our cabin, granny, her sister, and maybe Mr. Bates were setting up a yard sale. Mom takes a look at the stuff spread out on tables and can see her own past scattered amongst the junk. From Las Vegas ashtrays she’s owned to a heater she used in Angola, New York, while the sliced-up shower curtain only added more worry.

Missouri

Leaving town, we drove past one of the guys from Deliverance. A shave, shower, and some dental work were in order. Missouri is definitely a state with rich contrasts. What the amenities failed to deliver on, the beauty of the landscape makes up for.

Missouri

Breakfast was at 54 Café in Nevada, not the state: I meant Nevada, Missouri.

Kansas

Nothing else much happened this morning as we were driving out of Missouri. Then, in the early afternoon, just before we were about to turn right, a procession of wide-load vehicles was coming our way. The lead vehicle pulls into the middle of the street with flashing lights to alert drivers in both directions to slow down. I can see a truck approaching, hauling a giant pipe about to make a right on our road. So I pull closer to the right. After the first truck passes, the follow vehicle leaves its position to race ahead of the first truck. We see another exact configuration approaching.

While Mom and I sit at the stop sign, the second lead vehicle stops in the middle of the road just as the previous guy did. A tow truck driver behind the lead vehicle is not paying attention, and before he knows it, he is approaching way too fast. With a Lincoln Town Car on his hitch, he locks up his brakes, and as he begins to slide right to avoid the stopped lead vehicle, he is heading directly at us.

There is no doubt in my mind that we are about to be T-boned by this freight train and that if I’m hit, I am certainly going to die in the wreckage. As he is sliding at the speed of sound, I hit the gas after contemplating putting it in reverse but decided I may not be able to do it quick enough, and if the transmission hesitates even a second I’m still going to be hit. As the car accelerates quickly, I have to maneuver over gravel under the right tires and try not to lose traction as, again, I know we are close to being hit.

I am nearly around the corner and thinking about driving down the embankment to save us from being jackhammered as I see his bumper in my peripheral vision with the rearview mirror reflecting his red tow truck and the white smoke billowing out of his locked and skidding tires. We miss sliding into the ditch with the tires holding traction and we continue accelerating down the road as fast as we can. The tow truck, at one point, could not have been more than a few inches away from us.

Kansas

A quarter-mile down the road, gasping for air and nearly in tears, we pull into a driveway to catch our breath and check our underwear. Just as we exit the van, the old guy in the tow truck passes us with a brief, casual wave and a cigarette dangling from his lips as though this was routine in the course of his daily routine. Mom suppresses the need to flip the man a bird and we get back in the van and try to calmly drive away.

I require an hour or two before feeling like things have calmed down and that my adrenaline won’t trigger some kind of heart condition. I’m done with Kansas and am now ready to leave the state.

Kansas

I should point out that this tow truck, but especially the Lincoln Town Car, was especially traumatic to mom as just two months ago, on May 5th, while leaving the freeway in Phoenix, mom rolled her own white Lincoln Town Car that required her to be airlifted to the hospital. Maybe that close call with the possibility of a deadly outcome was what motivated her to want to see the city of her birth one more time. Then here we are out in the middle of Nowhere, Kansas, and the haunting image of the killer Town Car was trying to collect the soul that had been spared fairly recently.

Slow down, take deep breaths, and things will be fine.

Kansas

I do love Kansas. When Caroline and I first passed through this state five years ago we were enchanted with the places we saw. The Great Plains have a different kind of beauty than the heavily wooded eastern U.S. or the mountainous western states, but the charm is undeniable.

Kansas

I feel that there’s much to explore out here, but with over 600 miles we’re trying to cover today, we don’t have the time to collect place names or linger to admire the finer details.

Kansas

Why were the lights flashing here? There was no train. I waited as I really wanted to see one lumber by out here on the Great Plains, but there was nothing.

Kansas

No, Mom, we are not stopping for ice cream, pie, walleye, pizza, a bakery, a fruit stand, or a winery. I’m stopping to look at the horses because one of them is telepathically signaling me to rescue it from the other horses that are forcing it to herd with them when it just wants to be free.

Kansas

Passing over the Cimarron River, we are close to leaving Kansas.

Oklahoma

Can someone, anyone, tell me why it is hotter out here on the plains than it is in the deserts of Arizona? At a gas station, the sign says it’s 108 degrees, but the attendant said someone reported an asphalt temperature of 136 degrees down on the interstate. The humidity is starting to fade the further west we go, but this is still an overwhelming scorcher of a day.

Oklahoma

The sights of roadside America leave indelible impressions in my mind, but with photos, I can share the things I’ve seen in my past with my future self and, of course, with Caroline, who wasn’t able to travel with us. Lucky her.

Oklahoma

Sunflowers are the plants of smiles. Who can look at a field of these yellow and black plants and fail to find a moment of happiness? Or maybe I’m just projecting this as knowing we are about to enter Texas; I know I’m only a couple of states away from getting back to Arizona and into the arms of my wife.

Texas

Leaving Oklahoma using small back roads, we do not find anything that hints at an upcoming spot for dinner. The first couple of towns in Texas are not delivering any promise either. Then, about to enter Canadian, Texas, we see a billboard directing our attention to the Cattlemen’s Exchange Steak and BBQ Restaurant. This place is drawing us in.

Texas

The Cattle Exchange Restaurant in Canadian, Texas, has by far the BEST steak I have ever had in my life! EVER! They have the best bread pudding, too. Their salsa is homemade and GREAT! Their bread is unbelievable! But that RIBEYE STEAK is the thing you (and with that, I mean: I) will come back to Canadian, Texas, for.

Forget Morton’s, Fleming’s, Ruth’s Chris, and any other contender. The Cattle Exchange in the little town of Canadian in the Texas Panhandle has set the bar for the best mesquite broiled steak in the Universe. And best bread pudding. The ranch dressing is no slouch, either. – Yeah, I was impressed. If you don’t someday make your way to this little corner of the panhandle of Texas for this wonderful treat, you are truly missing out on life.

Texas

Leaving Canadian we drive by some well-kept, beautiful old homes and a meticulously renovated old theater. Outside of town, the landscape is lusciously green. Mom exalts high praise on the state she was afraid was too boring and ugly for her tastes, a newfound appreciation has been found.

We breeze by Amarillo and stop in Vega at the Bonanza Motel, where, for $45, we have a room on Saturday night that isn’t the backdrop for some horror plot. Tomorrow, we will be home.

Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 14

Illinois

Our goal today is to go far. Finding a balance between taking small roads to avoid large cities and their inherent congestion and making quick time seems mostly impossible. We get out of French Lick and head over to Montgomery, Indiana, before stopping for breakfast at a little Amish-influenced place. By setting ourselves in motion, it feels like progress is being made right away. Before we know it we are crossing into Illinois and are almost halfway across the Midwest.

Illinois

U.S. Route 50 takes us straight through farmland, allowing us to travel nearly at the speed of the freeway but without the semi-trucks and endless franchises that define America’s main arterial roads. I prefer to lose 30 miles per hour for the calm tranquility of passing fields of corn that are so close I can reach out and touch them or maybe just stop and photograph a field of it as a reminder that I’ve been here.

Illinois

There’s a lot of corn grown in this state, but by the time we reached Odin, Illinois, where we picked up some fresh tomatoes being sold next to the road, it was time to step south in order to give a wide berth to St. Louis and avoid even a hint of the suburbs. Great, now we have tomatoes, but not a grain of salt. We need a store or a fast-food restaurant.

Illinois

In Pinckneyville, Illinois, we spot a McDonald’s and score a few salt packets so we can start enjoying the tomatoes. A place across the street offering oil changes allows us to have some basic maintenance done on Mom’s van, which has already been driven more than 4,500 miles on this trip. The guy’s hopefully removed some of the ticks out of the car when they vacuumed it. We don’t know for certain that there were any ticks in the car, but Mom was worried after all my stops to take photos.

Illinois

About to leave Modoc, Illinois, across the Mississippi River by a small ferry for $8, heading into Saint Genevieve, Missouri.

Illinois

At 100 degrees on the river with what feels like an equal amount of humidity, we might as well be in the river. Except, the last place I want to be right now while riding a ferry across the mighty Mississippi River is on a capsizing boat taking us to nice dry land on the other side in a different state.

Missouri

Collecting more ticks, so my neurotic mother is more occupied with pestilence instead of food.

Missouri

The torment that must exist in my mom as she vacillates between imagined variants of the plague and the overwhelming desire for calories to regulate her serotonin would push lesser people into therapy. Again, we are at the point where it’s too hot to do anything but seeing the Charleville Vineyard here in Ste. Genevieve, she’s all of a sudden energized into buying more wine. If you’ve been keeping track, you wouldn’t be wrong in assuming we have quite a few cases of wine stowed here in the van.

While you’d never guess it from the picture I captured at a moment with no one else in sight, the Old Brick House was packed, so we went over to the Anvil Restaurant, which was the second recommendation. The Anvil has been open since 1855 and has the best onion rings mom and I have ever had. I had a chicken fried steak that was the daily special, while mom opted for a burger.

Missouri

Looking at the path our road trip took, I’m left wondering years later what exactly was the motivation for the drive south only to turn north again, but that’s what we are doing today instead of holding a steady westerly direction. Here we are on one of those northern legs about to cross the Missouri River.

Missouri

Of course, there’s more corn out here; it’s the Midwest, right?

Missouri

Crossing the Missouri River, we arrive in the unincorporated area known as Dutzow. It’s the Blumenhof Vineyard & Winery that drags us out of the car. Mom purchases even more wine. Further west on the river is the city of Hermann, Missouri. Why are we here? Lunch, shoes, ice cream? Nope, more wine. Back in Dutzow, the proprietor told Mom of the Hermannhof Winery. Mom goes berserk and is about to leave with two full cases. One half a case is for Caroline, but after sampling their sparkling grape juice, we left with a case of it too.

Missouri

Back across the Missouri River on a road that will keep us the closest to the river until we have to turn south again.

Missouri

Our turn south was happening in Jefferson City, Missouri, which also serves as the location to have dinner. We’re not done driving yet, as we are determined to cover more ground today before exhaustion sets in.

Missouri

Highway 54 takes us past the over-commercialized Lake of the Ozarks area, but not before we stop for a Custard at Andy’s in Osage Beach. We make it as far as Weaubleau, Missouri before I’m just too tired to continue on. The Weaubleau Motel offers small cabins for only $40, including tax and cash only. The pillows are sofa pillows, the shower has a sizable colony of spiders in residence, and the place is at least 20 degrees hotter than outside. The last temperature we saw 45 minutes before checking in was 91 degrees; this room is well over 105. The air conditioner makes a valiant attempt to cool things, but after 30 minutes, it’s still ridiculously hot. Only $40, hmmm, maybe not the best bargain, but then again, I was about to pass out on the road.

Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 13

Ohio

Millies Café – “Go a quarter-mile and turn right at the caution light, go about four miles” are the instructions we use to find breakfast. Nothing on the highway identifies the place. Good thing we arrived on Wednesday, according to the waitress, as on weekends it’s standing room only. If you were to see for yourself how sparse the local population is out here, you’d understand how popular this place is to bring people in from near and far.

Ohio

Before and after breakfast, we were dealing with somewhat heavy fog, which quickly burned off into a blistering heat combined with humidity conditions, leaving us feeling like we were in a tropical fishbowl. We sweat. The air conditioner vents in the car sweat. The air is sweating. Humidity is a nemesis and absolutely alien to someone who’s been living in that good old Arizona dry heat. Moving around causes each individual pore to sweat in a kind of torture. Seconds later, every square inch of clothing is damp, but it’s so hot that our clothes are not cooled by the breeze or fans blowing air in the car. We are so hot and humid that we start creating our own personal cloud of humidity. I think we will start raining upon ourselves.

Ohio

The Ohio River Valley in July is not only a nearly unbearable land of humidity but also laden with crops this time of year. From vineyards, corn, beans, and melons to tomatoes, peppers, cucumbers, eggplant, and tobacco, we are taking inventory of a cornucopia of produce here along the river.

Ohio

Towns come and go, none really stand out. The scenery is definitely the winner here until we make Manchester, Ohio, where we stop at a small winery called Moyer on the Ohio. As they also have a cafe on the premises we use the opportunity to have lunch. Mom also picked up four bottles of Ohio wine, and we were right back on the road.

Ohio

Our waitress recommended that we cross the river into Maysville, Kentucky, about 20 minutes southwest of the winery. She emphasized that we go to Old Washington in Maysville in particular.

Ohio

I don’t believe I’ll ever be able to just drive by an abandoned gas station, as there’s something fascinating about these places. My best guess about what the attraction is would be that my imagination conjures the sights and sounds of travelers from the past who are driving somewhere new. Not going to work or school but on a migrant journey following opportunity and chasing new horizons. Without the mass media, we have today, those travelers from a previous age would be venturing into a great unknown where every corner showed them the unexpected.

Those people were fleeing their own uncertainty and inability to deal with particular situations, hoping for a new start elsewhere. When I stopped at a house in ruin, there really wasn’t anything special about the chaos of the place that appeared ransacked following its previous inhabitants abandoning it, but there was one thing that stood out. While everything appears to be turned over the potholder above the stove looks untouched. The person who put that back up on its hook after removing dinner from the oven probably never thought that they’d never use it again.

There are certainly parallels between these rural abandonments and Buffalo, which makes me wonder about what places in America are next.

Kentucky

Great recommendation from the woman at the winery to visit Old Washington. This is where Harriet Beecher Stowe found some of the inspiration to write Uncle Tom’s Cabin after watching a slave auction at the local courthouse back in 1833.

Kentucky

Quite a few old buildings from the 1700s still stand on Old Main Street; I only wish we had more time to visit. The truth is that we had enough time, but the hot weather and humidity were too oppressive for Mom’s comfort, so she waited in the car with the a/c on while I jumped out and grabbed a few photos.

Kentucky

There’s a lot of history in this small town I hope to find again someday in the future, but for now, we are leaving.

Kentucky

Back across the river in Ohio, just before Ripley, we stop to take a photo of a houseboat that is undergoing renovation. Seeing the owner, Mom now has the wherewithal to exit the car. I see how it is; if it’s something my mom wants, she’ll go the extra mile. She asks Bob, the owner of a local upholstery shop, about his labor of love. He’s been working on this aluminum 42-footer for four years now and is almost ready to start putting it back together.

Kentucky

Ripley itself is one of the towns Mom and I swear we must come back to. Sometimes, in the most unlikely of places, the most wonderful surprises await you. Today, it happened multiple times. Driving through Ripley, Mom spots an Easy Step shoe outlet and insists on visiting. Twenty minutes later, with five pairs of shoes and a new purse, she emerges to me, napping in the running car.

Kentucky

A few more miles down the road, and we’re aiming to cross the river back into Kentucky. Our $5 ferry ride has us landing in Augusta, Kentucky, our next amazing surprise location. Not far after leaving Augusta, we are on some of the twistiest roads known to mankind. A light rain starts to fall, but only for a minute before it starts to pummel the earth. Darkness descends in midday, and lightning strikes not more than 300 feet in front of us, making Mom grab my arm so quickly and tightly that I thought I’d jerk the van off the road.

Kentucky

The rain comes and goes while the road continues to twist and turn, zig and zag and we finally return to the road we were supposed to be on. The next stop was at a gas station for the facilities. I ask about a good place for home cooking and the attendant is quick to tell us of Mr. Ed’s in Verona. About 10 miles up the highway and then about 3 miles west, we will find Verona. One wrong turn, and we took the long way down a narrow road, which proved nice for photos but added a few miles to the journey. At the intersection of Mudlick and Glencoe Roads, we see that the girl meant Mr. Herb’s in Verona; there could not be another restaurant in this tiny village.

Kentucky

The food is excellent. The starter is fried green tomatoes; we agree they are the best we have ever had. I ordered the cod, for which they are locally famous, and Mom went for the catfish. For sides, Mom has more fried green tomatoes, and for me, the green beans. Both of our dishes are great, but I would have preferred the catfish. For dessert, we nearly have coronaries before reaching the front door after gobbling down a deep-fried slice of apple pie with ice cream and caramel sauce, an “oh my god!” experience. Feeling like we’re falling behind schedule, although it’s a loose one for sure, we decide on taking the dreaded freeway to shave some time off the driving requirements.

John Wise in Indiana

The idea was to beeline it to Madison, Indiana, and then take Highway 56 across the state as we continue in our effort to bypass any major cities and minimize freeway driving. Right, enough energy to go shoe shopping and eat deep-fried apple pie, but it’s too hot, and her feet hurt, so I have to get out and snap a selfie of myself. I should have worn donuts on my shoulders to get my mom to follow me around.

Indiana

Does that look like Kentucky to you? As far as I could tell, the barge was hauling coal.

Indiana

In Old Madison, we almost ruined our plans. This place must be one of a small handful of absolutely perfect places in America. I had said Harbor Springs in Michigan would be in the top three, and Monterey, California, would probably be there too; that leaves Madison to round out the list. I’ll have to give this more thought and see just what my top 10 favorite American cities would be. I suppose I would also want to include Canandaigua, New York. While I’m at it, throw in Apalachicola, Florida, so there it is a beginning to my all-time favorite cities in the United States.

Indiana

We talk of staying the night after spotting a riverside motel that, for only $59, begs us to stay. Our loved ones back home are begging us to return, so we decide it’s better to get a few more miles down the road before calling it a day.

Indiana

Only 75 more miles were driven before we were too tired to continue. We made it to Paoli, Indiana, but didn’t quite find what we were looking for in accommodations. In French Lick, we stop at the Lane Motel grabbing a nice little room for about $57.

Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 12

Pennsylvania

Breakfast starts the day at a little café called Skyjet located at the ‘top of the hill’ right here in Tionesta. Nice place with average food, not bad at all, just not outstanding.

Pennsylvania

Our drive is taking us through the Allegheny National Forest and mostly along the Allegheny River. The road twists and turns for quite a long time. We zig and zag, heading toward the western edge of Pennsylvania. Our goal is to stay in rural settings as much as possible as we aim to find the Ohio River somewhere out in front of us.

Pennsylvania

Countryside ruins hold intrigue as I wonder about the lives that occurred within these walls and consider the lost dreams as the former inhabitants pulled up roots and moved down the road to start over. On the other hand, urban ruins are loaded with the bad feelings of people who may have never had ambitions and were simply beaten down by the system. For me, they are two sides of tragedy but one I never want to witness firsthand as I don’t believe the latter really ever aims for a fresh start.

Pennsylvania

By the time we reach Oil City, Pennsylvania, it’s time to take a hard left to aim south. The sky is cloudy but does not appear to be threatening us with imminent rain. The humidity is almost overwhelming. Everything in the car is damp, everything we wear is damp, and sweat continuously drips, dampening our hopes of drying out. Our escape from the heat of the Arizona summer has been less than effective, futile even. The next day’s weather report tells us to expect more of the same. Caroline informs us it’s over 120 ‘real’ degrees in Phoenix, not the reported 117 degrees.

Pennsylvania

Through farms and forests, we crawl along. Finding elderflowers in Eldersville, Pennsylvania, seemed poetic. West of there, we enter West Virginia at a tiny border crossing that apparently doesn’t deserve a Welcome to West Virginia sign. Our first town is Follansbee where we stumble upon a bakery; not much left, though, we leave with a still-hot blackberry pie. Don’t think for a second we left with a slice; we left with the whole thing.

Wellsburg, West Virginia, is a well-maintained, beautiful village kept alive by the steel industry and coal-generated power. Lunch was at a small Main Street restaurant with a great homemade chicken dumpling soup. Their chicken pot pie was the daily special; I went for it while Mom had a Philly cheesesteak. Steel and coal are still alive here, and the town is better for it. Wellsburg is impeccable.

Pennsylvania

We remain on the West Virginia side of the Ohio River as we meander further south for another hour or two of curves and hills. Passing the south side of Wheeling, we cross over the river, landing in Ohio. More forests and farms dot the landscape along this side of the Ohio River.

Pennsylvania

It is a slow day of driving for us and by the time we start approaching Belpre, Ohio, we are ready for dinner. I know you must be thinking, “Jeez, these two are eating their way across America.” To an extent, that is true, but since leaving Wellsburg, hours and hours have passed.

Ohio

We see that Parkersburg, West Virginia, is bigger than Belpre and figure there are better dining options over there. So we pay the toll to cross the bridge and, at the toll booth ask an elderly guy where’s the best place to get catfish. He recommends that we go back up Route 7 over in Ohio, where we just came from, to a place called Catfish Heaven. Great, we make a U-turn that takes a mile to figure out. We pay the toll to return over the bridge and head back up Route 7.

Four or five miles, just as the guy told us. There it is, except it is called Catfish Paradise. I should note I know this is the right place because before committing to this backtracking, I stopped at a 7/11 to ask the cashier for confirmation of the location. I explained that my mom and I wanted some catfish and that the guy at the toll booth told us about Catfish Heaven; she nodded in agreement and confirmed that the place is only 4 or 5 miles north.

Ohio

We miss the turn but find a middle-of-the-road spot to make a U-turn that was probably only supposed to be used by law enforcement – hey, I’m a tourist! We see fishermen around the roadside little lake and think, wow, this must be a catch-and-eat fresh kind of place. Oh, NO, it’s not! This is not a restaurant. This is a catfish farm with no onsite cook waiting to batter our fresh catch of the day and throw some hot sauce and lemon at us.

I’m sure that this is some kind of joke played on tourists, knowing we wanted fried fish, not swimming fish. Mom is cackling like a chicken; I’m a bit annoyed at wasting the 20 minutes, seventy cents in tolls, and having to listen to Mom bust a gut for the next 10 minutes.

Ohio

Defeated we decide to skip our hunt for fish and keep on driving, certain we’ll find something soon.

Ohio

Out on the Ohio Scenic Byway just enjoying the day.

Ohio

Lucky us as one of our encounters with a local person, had recommended that we leave Highway 7 and take Route 124 instead. We are now on even more rural lands with no services, no hotels, no restaurants, and a detour. Tomato fields, bell peppers, corn, eggplants, chilies, beans, and more tomatoes dot the landscape here near the Ohio River.

The urge to nab a few of the red ripe tomatoes is almost too much to bear, but Mom shoves a heap of guilt on me that this would be stealing. It would be sampling, and there is no one roadside to sell us any. We drive on.

Ohio

With starvation setting in, we are now wishing we’d grabbed a couple of those catfish that could be turned into sushi instead of facing death. That Bocce Club pizza we bought a few days ago and sat on the backseat for a day or so would come in handy about now, and we’re both certain it would still be great. Dreams of Perry’s ice cream overwhelm us as we cruise through this food desert where the uncertainty of our next meal is torturing us.

Ohio

Beautiful river scenery and tiny villages go by until we reach Pomeroy, the largest town we have seen in hours. So large is Pomeroy that it has a McDonalds, a KFC, and a Wendy’s. It is the Wild Horse Café, though, that gets our vote for dinner.

Ohio

We are sitting riverside at sunset for dinner. Our server brings over some tortilla chips with salsa that is surprisingly really good. Waiting on our entrees we have this great view of the glowing clouds reflecting in the Ohio River. Our lodging for the evening is also in Pomeroy at the Meigs Motel. More of the Ohio River awaits us in the morning.

Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 11

Buffalo, New York 2005

Certain family members didn’t like the idea that their grandson was going to be living in a ghetto, and so just before I was born, my mother and father moved into an apartment here at 36 Chapel Road in the Kenmore neighborhood. While only a few miles away from Sheridan Park, it remains a world away to this day. This wasn’t our first stop today, nor would it be our last, but by the time we start to head out of Buffalo later, we’ll have driven nearly 400 miles over the streets of what was once known as the City of Lights, but today would better be known as the City of Crime.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Art Deco was all the rave in 1920 when the North Park Theatre was opened. The stained glass windows that were falling into disrepair have been hidden behind walls, architectural changes were made to save on heating costs, and over time, like so many things in Buffalo, there was too little commerce and little care for a theater when larger problems were challenging Buffalonians. Back in 1998, Buffalo native Vincent Gallo, who directed Buffalo ’66, premiered his movie right here at North Park. Stars Christina Ricci and Asia Argento joined Vincent, bringing a touch of glamor back to the theater for a moment. Remember that I’m writing this in 2019, and just around the corner in 2020, the theater will be celebrating its 100th anniversary. In 2013, new owners started the laborious process of restoring North Park to its former glory. In the summer of 2019, during the theatre’s reopening, the lobby’s high ceilings and views of the restored stained glass were unveiled.

Buffalo, New York 2005

A hoped-for breakfast stop at an old deli scheduled to reopen today after its owner had been on vacation was a futile waste of time as nothing inside was set up, and as we were looking inside, the gruff, unfriendly owner chased us away, telling us he was not reopening and that’s that. It turned out that within 60 days, that old guy named Jack Shapiro would retire, and Mastman’s Kosher Deli would disappear.

We ate at Bertha’s Diner just down the road here on Hertel Avenue instead. Nice place. Just an old-style coffee shop with some ridiculously low prices. A table nearby is overheard talking about Schwabl’s, a restaurant of keen interest to us. They confirm that one of them has eaten there in the past week, and it is, in fact, still open. Lunch is on the schedule.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Earlier, I said Buffalo should be called the City of Crime. While the rate of violent crime has fallen since the 1990s, Buffalo is still usually in the top 10 of the most dangerous cities in America. The poverty rate here stands around 30%, and moving through its streets, the sense of that danger is palpable. As far as New York as a whole goes, Buffalo is the most dangerous city in the entire state. With that said, I never felt threatened anywhere we visited, but then again, I also knew that I would not want to be the person needing to walk through this neighborhood at night after buying one of these beautiful buildings for a renovation project. By the way, check out this Jackson’s Produce & Meats shop with the box glued onto the front of the old house; doesn’t it give the impression that the cannibal slaughter was going on in the main house with body parts being sold in the front?

Buffalo, New York 2005

The ethnic hate and racism in this city are worn right out in front. Apparently, this council member, Nick Bonifacio guy was a “Handpicked party controlled Italian.” Listening in on Buffalonians at some of the eating establishments, it’s easy to overhear conversations about the “Eyetalians,” “Polacks,” “the Jews,” and “the Blacks or Coloreds.” I thought this kind of ethnic division was something from a previous century and that the North was supposed to be welcoming of African Americans, but that’s not my experience here on the streets of Buffalo.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Shortly after emigrating from Germany to Buffalo, New York, my family, the Kurchoffs, became established with a strong foothold in Buffalo.

Buffalo, New York 2005

That’s my mom sitting in front of Buffalo Engine House No. 26, built back in 1894 with the help of her great-grandfather.

Buffalo, New York 2005

In our senseless wandering around, somehow, we made it back out to West Seneca and Schwabl’s. Not only did we have a late breakfast, but it was not even lunchtime yet. Seeing we are able to shovel food in where it was thought there was no more space, we know ourselves well enough that if we leave now, we’ll not return later. So we walk into the nearly empty restaurant and are happy we did. Only 20 minutes after our arrival, not only was the place full but there were ten people waiting for a table.

The Schwabl family started their business of feeding people in this city back in 1837, only five years after Buffalo had become an official place on the map. By 1942, they were operating in their current location and will hopefully continue well into the future. Their specialty is the Roast Beef Sandwich On Kümmelweck, also known as beef on weck – a half-pound of hand-cut roast beef served on a fresh roll dusted with rock salt and caraway seeds with some sinus-clearing horseradish. For dessert, I order a stand-alone beef on weck without the sides. I think I could have eaten three of them.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We should have started heading south out of Buffalo, but Mom had one more stop she wanted us to make. So, back across town, but first, we dipped down Emslie Street here to visit the ruin of the Sacred Heart Church, where Aunt Eleanor was baptized and attended catechism as a child. Back then, the church was still new, having been built in 1913, shortly after Auntie was born. I wasn’t able to capture a decent photo of the church itself, so I snapped this image of the crossroads to act as my reminder of where the place was.

Buffalo, New York 2005

If I’d not taken this photo myself, you could have told me that this 1950 Packard Sedan had just come off the assembly line and that I was looking at Buffalo during its heyday. This was almost our last stop in the city today, but next, we took a drive past Our Lady of Victory Basilica, which was also known as Father Baker’s. This was another situation where I was not going to be able to get a decent photo, which is a shame as it’s a very nice-looking cathedral and, as I was informed, the place where I was baptized. Time to leave Buffalo.

Buffalo, New York 2005

As we point the car to the southwest, we are effectively aiming for home, but we’ll first have to stop in Angola. Mom is nervous about heading down, and I think she’d like to postpone our visit, but my curiosity is too great. Our family used to own a summer cottage on Lake Erie in Angola, and the last time mom was there in 1993, the place was in ruins; she was expecting worse today. The last time I visited the cottage was probably in 1968.

Arriving in Angola off Lake Shore Road at the intersection with Humboldt Avenue, we find the place entirely renovated. The man renting it tells us he’s moving out soon and talks a bit about the new owner. I ask if I can take photos of the outside, and he obliges me. We walk around the old place and try to remember our days spent here long ago. Mom and I, as children, had both spent summers out here next to the lake with Grandma Josephine and Auntie. Mom, as an adult, had also lived out here after she and her second husband considered making a life south of Buffalo. That didn’t work out, and ultimately it was sold off. Without fanfare, we leave driving southwest a day ahead of schedule.

Buffalo was exhausting but also taught me a lot about who my mother is, considering the environment she grew up in. My mom was born in 1947 before the exodus of the city had begun. She stayed long enough through the early 1970s to witness the first mass migration when 100,000 people were moving away from Buffalo during those years. She watched poverty skyrocket and witnessed her parents lose their life savings to a swindler. Her poor decision to become sexually active at 14 years old (while good for me) likely put her in a far worse position than if she’d finished high school and (maybe) attended university. She appears to have grown up blaming others for her situations, rarely taking responsibility for her biases and blunders. First, moving to California in an attempt to reconcile with my father, she quickly realized the error of her ways and returned to Buffalo, but only shortly before marrying another man and moving to Phoenix, Arizona, to start fresh. I have no idea what my mother was looking for in Buffalo and even less hope that she found anything more than bittersweet nostalgia.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Out of the depravity of upstate New York and back into the bucolic countryside of rural America. I love it out here.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Ah, yes, it’s Dolly Dimples again. Caroline and I passed this psycho-killer monument back in 2000 when we were driving to Buffalo for the first time. Dolly lives at Valvo’s Candies in Silver Creek, New York. Click here to see my old photo at night and just try to imagine her emerging out of the night.

Karen Goff and John Wise in Buffalo, New York 2005

Our last stop on one of the Great Lakes, Lake Erie, to be exact. I may someday be proven wrong but I believe this is the last photo of my mom and I ever taken. My mom died on March 25, 2018. It’s strange to think that over the intervening 13 years, there wasn’t one more photo taken of the two of us.

Pennsylvania

Playing it by ear, we drive south into Pennsylvania through some Amish areas before reaching Warren on the Allegheny River. It’s a nice little town. Mom has to do some laundry, so we take a pause in the trek home. This was also our last chance for scoops of Perry’s ice cream and we didn’t pass up the opportunity. Once a glutton, always a glutton.

Pennsylvania

We did not pull up to an Amish household and ask to do our laundry here, though if I thought it possible, I’d love to spend a few days with an Amish family learning firsthand about their way of life.

Pennsylvania

A couple of hours later, we find ourselves continuing along the Allegheny River.

It’s getting late in the day, and sunset is soon to happen. Mom is hungry for some dinner, so we check into Mid-Town Motel in Tionesta, Pennsylvania, for under $65, including tax. Without paying, we are given a key and told to come back after we eat as the only open restaurant stops serving at 9:00 p.m. which is only about 15 minutes from now. The Forest Inn was on the other side of the Allegheny River, with lasagna as the special of the day. We both opted for it out of convenience. With drinks, dinner was a reasonable price of only $18.65 without tip.

Back on the other side of the river, we stop at the front office and pay our bill offering thanks for getting us to dinner with minutes to spare. The room is great, terrific even. We have a fridge, stove, two TVs, A/C, microwave, small dining room table, a desk, couch, and three ceiling fans, and we are across the street from the river. Tomorrow, we send ourselves in the direction of the Ohio River which we should pick up just south of Wheeling, West Virginia.

Mother and Son Going to Buffalo, NY – Day 10

Buffalo, New York 2005

Buffalo is dismal. Breakfast was equally dismal. How can my mom have fond memories of Tim Hortons? I wish Kelly’s Country Store over on Grand Island had been open early as at least I had great memories of that place from my youth, while Tim Hortons has left me with scars. As the day went on, our bad doughnuts and sour orange juice, in retrospect, seemed appropriate for the taste Buffalo would leave in my mouth. Even here at the Harbour Place Marine, where my grandfather had docked his yacht, and at the once elegant restaurant where my mother tells me I first ate frog’s legs, the shine is gone.

John Wise, Shari Wise with parents Karen Kurchoff, John Wise with Herbert and Hazel Kurchoff in Buffalo New York in 1966

Speaking of those good old days in Buffalo, here we are on Easter in 1966 at that once elegant restaurant I mentioned, which was then known as Jafco Marina & Restaurant. I’m sitting in my mom’s lap (please don’t ask me to explain the shower cap), and my father is on her left. My sister Shari sits in front of Horror Bunny, and that’s my Grandma Hazel and Grandpa Herbert on the right.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We drive along the Niagara River on River Road on our way to more of Mom’s old favs. Next up was Sully’s Olde Tyme Bar & Grille, which only closed up shop the year before. We know this because the front door was open, and I stepped in. Sully’s is where my mom was introduced to beef on weck, which is a Buffalo favorite of sliced roast beef served on a kimmelweck roll with gravy and horseradish. A kimmelweck is a bun with rock salt and caraway seeds on top. The new owner picked up the place for the view for a little more than $40,000. A corner lot with an unimpeded view of the Niagara River is a great view for sure, but the building is approaching 200 years of age! It was apparently originally used as a mule rest stop and feeding area when the Erie Canal was still running in front of the place. Today, the Erie Canal in this area has been replaced with a parkway.

Nostalgia can be a wicked shovel digging up a past better left alone. As we drove north on River Road, we approached a factory where both my father and Aunt Anne once worked, DuPont. Here we are in Tonawanda, digging into mom’s history when she has the brilliant idea of taking a photo of the place to share with my great aunt back in Santa Barbara, California. Good idea, Mom, let me just jump out of the car and start snapping photos of this chemical factory in post-9/11 America. At the time I made the quick and likely unsafe left turn and parked illegally on the corner, I was oblivious to the situation I was creating. But upon getting back in the car and starting to pull away, a police officer must have been seeing reality differently than I was and figured I needed a wake-up call with some early morning disco lights and siren action.

Those lights spelled party time. “What are you doing?” was the first question the officer posed to me. “I know this looks bad, probably really bad. I hadn’t thought about just how dumb it must look with me jumping out of an illegally parked car to snap photos of a chemical factory, but I do now.” He takes my driver’s license, the registration, and my camera back to his car as another officer pulls in behind the first one. The second officer approaches after conferring with the first and asks what we are doing. We explain the Bocce Club, Texas Red Hots, fresh raspberries, Anderson’s, Perry’s, pilgrimage to the place of our birth and, in the same breath, apologize for the momentary cranial disconnect in causing them more work as I stupidly took photos that in quick hindsight was obviously a bad idea.

The original officer came back, giving back the camera, my license, the registration, and even an apology for keeping us; I was surprised. A mild admonishment was delivered with further warnings to stay away from old factory facilities. While sitting there, I was nearly certain I was about to be tasered, dragged from the automobile, and taken downtown for further questioning before ending up in the hoosegow for the night. Hmmm, I’ve probably watched too many bad movies as nothing like that happened.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Time to move into the suburbs over on Chadduck and Condon Avenues, where Grandma and Grandpa Kurchoff lived before buying the house on Nadon Place.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We drove through random neighborhoods where I could briefly entertain thoughts of how cool it would be to live in this area until you turn a corner and reenter the city in a place that looks as if the zombie apocalypse is most likely to begin here. Well, this place or Detroit, but then again, I suppose parts of Indiana should be a contender for that honor, too. If it isn’t the constant reminders of decay and poverty we encounter around far too many corners; then it’s the threat of some of the most hostile winter weather America sees right here next to Lake Erie that should keep one on one’s toes should one find oneself being seduced by Buffalo.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Founded in 1927 and still surviving to this day is Parkside Candy. We would have stopped had they been open, but this being Sunday, most places are either closed or open late. We don’t have time to mess around as we are on the crawl for all the things my mom needs to see in order for her to feel she’s had a full Buffalo experience. So, we continue our drive into history.

Buffalo, New York 2005

The poverty seen here has infiltrated the entire greater Buffalo area. You never know from one corner to the next where filth and decrepitude will give way to what in some corners of the country would be million-dollar homes. This might be normal to people who’ve grown up here, but to me, there’s an element of anxiety that comes with my knowledge that people have to endure this oppressive, crushing environment.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Not happy with nearly getting in trouble at one factory we end up at a derelict old General Electric ruin. This is where our aunt Eleanor worked from an early age all the way through retirement. This factory made transistors ceasing operations somewhere during the early 70s. No one approached us to stop taking photos, though I was cautious that someone would run by and try stealing my camera or carjack the van.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We are on Main Street, which runs from downtown to the South Campus of the University of Buffalo. Not much to be said for wide swaths of this city approaching collapse.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Under this water tower was a Packard assembly plant with a showroom out front. When we were in town, the building was being used as a warehouse. Somewhere during the time we visited and today in 2019, the old Packard building complex has been converted to low-cost affordable housing.

Buffalo, New York 2005

The Anchor Bar, where my mom swears that co-owner Teressa taught her how to make Buffalo Wings back in the early 70s. In 1980, when I moved to Arizona, I’d never heard of the things in Los Angeles, but in this state right next to California, there were a few restaurants that were already serving wings at their pizza places. Using Frank’s Redhot Sauce, butter, and vinegar, my mom would make wings that beat just about everybody else’s for great taste. You see, my mother was prone to exaggeration and hyperbole (which some people might call bullshit), but I can tell you, due to me being afflicted with the same problem, that it’s likely mostly true that my mom learned to make wings right here at the Anchor Bar. Was it really from the woman who actually invented them, though? I’ll never know.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Mom had read some good things about Eddie Brady’s on Chippewa and Genesee Streets, but as luck would have it, they are closed on Sundays. I have to say that on this gray day with a big black old Cadillac parked on the street with a bunch of boarded-up collapsing buildings surrounding Eddie’s, I was happy this deserted part of Buffalo seemed to be screaming to get out of here. I was nearly certain that there was some bound and gagged stooly in the trunk who was on their way to the river. Fifteen years later, I’m looking on Google Maps, and the area has been renovated. I’d stop in now in a heartbeat.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Buffalo City Hall is a giant 32-story reminder of the grandeur and economic position this city once held. Not only was it home to the Barcalounger Chair and singer Rick James but it was the first city with electric street lights; the Pony Express and American Express were founded in Buffalo. In 1901, the city had more than 200 miles of paved roads, more than any other city on earth, and at one time, it had 60 millionaires living here, which was more than in any other city in America.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Buffalo today is a shadow of its former self. Declining standards in education, lack of investment in its population, and rising racism started driving people out of Buffalo decades ago with subsequent declines of investments in human capital that fed poverty and racism, creating a cycle that would guarantee that the city would never recover. The population is half the size it was at the height of its prosperity, and what can be easily gleaned from this catastrophic failure is that the acceptance of mediocrity in telling the average Joe that good enough is just that, is actually a recipe for a disaster that looks like this city.

Buffalo, New York 2005

If this is the face of stupid decisions where local attitudes played down the intellectual needs of a city to advance economically in our age, what will our country look like in the near future as this mentality of being just good enough and damning those who don’t go along with our jingoistic pride spreads cancer like across our country? It’s not good enough that tiny pockets of prosperity keep the glimmer of hope alive with thinking that we can turn something around and drag the decaying malaise out of its gutter. We must get off our knees in front of the altar of football and wings and start praying to the tools that offer education, but that’s a silly pipedream proven by this slum that overtook the aspirations of Billups Steakhouse and over 50% of the population of this once great city.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We stop on Richmond Avenue to visit Auntie’s old house. It’s still brown; a new owner bought it a year ago for about $160,000. Three stories and a basement, the price is so low it shocks me. We are invited in for a quick look around; wow, never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined I’d ever step back into a place I lived in 37 years ago. If this house had been in San Francisco, New York City, or Pacific Palisades, it would have sold for millions, but who wants to live in Buffalo, no matter how cheap it might be?

Buffalo, New York 2005

We visit old schools mom, my father, or I attended, old houses we lived in, the places we ate at, and all I hear are the echoes of tragedy. Grandma and Grandpa’s old business locations are gone; an old dairy where my great-grandfather operated his business is an abandoned shell. What’s left is an infrastructure to produce more poverty and more intolerance.

Buffalo, New York 2005

We tried visiting my aunt Lillian, who lives here in Eggertsville, in the same house her parents lived in. Fortunately, she wasn’t home. It was my mom’s idea to surprise her as she said she and my aunt had always gotten along well. I didn’t want to squash that idea, and I figured Lillian would be polite enough, but I don’t think my mom understood how the vitriol she spewed against my father had a toxic effect that poisoned any goodwill that this side of the family might have once held for my mother. How is it that people are able to live through the decades carrying such bitterness with them?

Buffalo, New York 2005

A long time ago, about 100 years prior to today, one of my maternal great-grandfathers operated a dairy from this location. His horse-drawn cart would be parked in the garage. So says my mother.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Mom has a particular affinity for many of Buffalo’s old buildings, as the Kurchoff family name is stamped on a few of them. My ancestors had something to do with the painting and construction of more than a couple of Buffalo’s landmark buildings.

Buffalo, New York 2005

There, on 1079 Union Road, at Sports Replay (which is now a Cricket Wireless shop as of this writing), once sat the shop owned by my grandmother Hazel Kurchoff. From this location in West Seneca, she was a consultant on interior design and would even make curtains and reupholster furniture for clients while Grandpa Herbie took care of woodworking and painting for clients. The family had survived the Great Depression and started regrowing their wealth, though a large piece of it was lost when an unscrupulous accountant made off with the majority of their savings in the 1970s and was never apprehended. The house on Rochester was sold by my aunt, who used the money to buy her place in Bradenton, Florida, followed by the family selling a cottage down on Lake Erie in the community of Angola, and then the house on Nadon before most everyone had relocated either to Florida or Arizona.

Buffalo, New York 2005

Worn out, we take a hotel early and fall to sleep with a much-needed nap. The Anchor Motel is on River Road south of Niagara Falls and only a mile and a half from the infamous Love Canal area. Before napping, the owner of the Anchor Motel gave us directions to Old Greenwalls for what he believed was great beef on weck. We got turned around, requiring help from Caroline in Arizona. On finding Old Greenwalls, we agreed that the sandwich was decent but not the best. Some ducks are nearly within petting distance and obviously used to a routine, so we oblige them with fries and old bread. Nearby, a squirrel shimmies up a trashcan, pilfering the Bocce Club pizza we just dumped that we’d been carrying around. A scoop of Perry’s Vanilla ice cream completes dinner.

To close out the day, I’d like to visit Niagara Falls, but Mom only reluctantly agrees to go. I guess with no great food stands and this having been an obligatory destination for visitors from out of town when my mom was a kid; there’s some kind of super-uncool factor going on here. That or she had once contemplated ending it by flinging herself over the edge. With someone not really interested in what I wanted to do, it was easy enough to snap a quick photo on the American side of the falls and return to the hotel.