Don’t Play With My Clock

Early morning in Phoenix, Arizona

I live in Arizona, where we do not observe Daylight Savings Time; the Navajo Nation is the exception. I’ve been living and growing older in this state for the past 25 years. Here, at 56 years old, I can tell how my sense of things changes with the natural rhythm of the clock, even though any obvious seasonal changes are relatively minor here in the desert. Usually, in November, I start to become more acutely aware that the days are getting shorter, and initially, there’s a slight sense of loss that has me asking myself if I did everything I wanted to do during those months when my days were long. Then, only a few months later, I became aware of an afternoon brightness that hinted to my internal clock that the short days of winter were running out.

There’s a melancholy I feel over these lengthening days as it dawns on me again that I’m transitioning through another passing season. I ask myself, did I best utilize my long nights to accomplish those things that are best suited for darkness? As I mourn the long nights fading away, I can’t yet appreciate the longer days that are ahead. I do start becoming more aware of the need to make plans of how we’ll best use those 16 to 18 hours a day of sunlight that will be upon us. If we’re not careful, they’ll pass without our participation and a season will have been lost.

So what happens to someone who abruptly has to change the clock an entire hour forward or back? I can’t imagine how unsettling this is to one’s senses as I rather enjoy my circadian rhythm, having the luxury of transitioning with the seasons, in tune with the spin of the earth that dictates when the sun rises and sets. Take this photo above that I shot at about 5:30 in the morning: two weeks ago, the eastern sky was pitch black, while this morning, it’s a dark blue. In a couple of weeks, I suspect the glow of dawn will start coming on strong, but if it were time to slam the clock forward, I would simply be catapulted from a walk at night one day to walk in daylight the very next day.

Being in rhythm instead of having to suddenly leapfrog forward or back feels right as I’m getting older. When I was younger, I didn’t so much notice it as much as I muscled through the transition, but I was also a much more emotionally volatile, impetuous young man. Today, as I become so fully aware of how I transition with time, I have to say I feel it’s a luxury to allow the senses to subtly move with the natural cycle of time and that humanity will have to realize and change this archaic yet modern collective forcing of a population to abandon what will likely prove to be an important cycle we are supposed to be well-tuned to.

Duncan Arizona – Day 3

Next to the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

For the astute, you might be noticing that we are on the north side of the Gila River this morning after sharing the south side the day before. It’s still cold, though maybe not as cold as yesterday; one thing was certain: there are not as many sandhill cranes traveling overhead as yesterday, either. The sound of the river valley and various birds under a crisp blue sky cannot be undersold; what is the price of a perfect place?

Sandhilll Cranes next to the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

I brought the wrong lens to photograph birds, even if they are giant birds. We hadn’t expected these elegant dinosaurs of the sky to be present at all out here, so this has been a nice surprise. Watching them fly, I have to wonder if the wave function that seems to control their formation doesn’t also influence the flap of their wings in relation to the rest of the flock. Then Caroline and I both wonder if there isn’t some quantum force as work that if the birds know they are going to be observed that they change their route to best avoid a direct gaze. Yesterday, the cranes were flying on the north side; today, they are over on the south.

Next to the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

The steam rising off the Gila River is a treasure to behold, and while I don’t feel the photo does it justice, it’s all I’ve got. Our first hour of the day comes and goes and with 2.5 miles under the belt, we needed to head back to the Simpson Hotel for our breakfast arrangements.

Breakfast at the Historic Simpson Hotel in Duncan, Arizona

Met David and Evelyn after we had our exquisite French-inspired breakfast knocked out by Clayton and Deborah. Instead of hitting the road and keeping my mouth shut, we started talking. Two hours later, we know that David and Evelyn, who admitted to being 77 years old, are, in truth, living in sin as a couple of dirty hippies. While this won’t make the news, it did work to give us all a good laugh as they embraced being outed for what they are. The real truth is that this couple, who met fairly recently via a senior dating site, is out traveling the desert southwest from their base in Tucson, which puts them close enough for the four of us to get together and compare travel notes at a future date. It’s great meeting curious people out exploring but especially so when you know first-hand how easy it is to do a lot of nothing.

A Panorama made by Don Carlos at Simpson Hotel in Duncan, Arizona

Also living and not just existing is resident artist Don Carlos, who shared with Caroline and me a collection of art pieces he’s created that’s going on exhibition up in Clifton soon.

Mount Graham and the Haekel Road sign in Eastern Arizona

Our time in Duncan has expired, and we are exiting town. We know we need to return soon, as off to the east, we still need to visit Gila Cliff Dwellings again, and northeast in Western New Mexico is the ghost town of Mogollon and another historic old hotel we’d like to grab bragging rights to. On the way down the highway, we stop at Haekel Road, which is German for crochet and also happens to be a turnoff that leads over to the Hot Well Dunes and further on to Bowie, Arizona. The snow-capped peaks in the background are Mt. Graham, and this trip would have included a visit if it weren’t for the road up the mountain being closed in winter.

Then, out of nowhere, lunch jumps out at us just when it seemed we’d only finished breakfast; funny how talking opens a time-dilation portal, and we lose track of where we are on the spectrum of the evolving day. Well, another stop at La Paloma in Solomon for brunch sounded perfect, so we figured why wait for a McDonald’s further down the road, and so we turned down that little street to this lunch locale.

Creepy doll at Geronimo, Arizona

Out on the eastern edge of the San Carlos Apache Reservation are the remnants of a ghost town called Geronimo that got its start as Camp Thomas back in 1876. Besides, the two signs at either end of the place that aren’t always there (due to theft) are the ruins of the Willis Auto Court gas station and a few rooms that used to be part of a small motel. Behind all of this is the shell of an old two-story mercantile, but all other signs of the town have long been erased from the map. Turns out there used to be a rail station here with service to Globe, a bakery, a couple of saloons, and even two Chinese restaurants that were operating for a while. The post office that opened in April of 1896 closed up shop on May 31, 1956. With the auto court and motel, the last operating businesses, a shooting at the bar halted what was left, and the town of Geronimo faded into history. The aging doll with half its face eaten off was inside one of the buildings; wish I knew its story.

Lizard at Besh-Be-Gowa Archaeological Park in Globe, Arizona

On Friday afternoon, passing through Globe on our way East, we noticed the turn-off for the Besh Ba Gowah Archaeological Park and Museum and talked about how, after all these years, we’ve never stopped. With time to spare on our way home today, we set it as a destination. The museum might be the best part of the facility, with many artifacts directly from the grounds but the buildings are mostly reconstructions that have us wondering how true to what might have originally been here starting some 800 years ago.

Guayo's El Ray Mexican Restaurant in Miami, Arizona

As we were about to pass through Miami, we were still far away from hungry after our lunch only four hours ago, but the same tipster that brought our attention to La Paloma over in Solomon also told us of the need to visit Guayo’s El Rey at 716 W Sullivan Street here in Miami. Also on the list was Mi Casa down in Benson, Arizona, but that is 165 miles south of us right now. So, would we go back to Guayo’s El Rey? In a second. I had one of the best carne asada’s ever.

Magma Hotel in Superior, Arizona

Hotel Magma is open again after being closed for decades, but I already wrote about that back in October; it bears repeating as I need the constant reminder that we need to book a room here before it closes again. Just then it dawns on me that I should check out how much it costs to stay a night or two. A quick phone call convinces me that we won’t be staying any time soon as the rates start at $198 a night.

West of Superior, Arizona

That’s the Valley of the Sun out there and the place we call home. From here forward, we reenter the heavy traffic, generic conformity, endless franchises, and routines we know so well. Our getaway to Duncan was more than we might have hoped for, and it easily became a place we’d consider returning to.

Duncan Arizona – Day 2

Along the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

Up at the crack of dawn because who says clichés shouldn’t be lived by on occasion? Looking out the front door at the frozen cars gave me pause, but not so much to stop our momentum to catch the sunrise and see if the bird trail lived up to its name.

Along the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

The grasses are alive as early birds flutter undercover of the brush. Overhead, we can hear the approach of the sandhill cranes long before we see them. Cranes turn out to be quite common here in the area at this time of year. Last night, we learned of the Wings Over Willcox festival that celebrates the cranes. It is held each January, and we will try to place a permanent note in our heads to visit next year.

Along the Gila River in Duncan, Arizona

Our walk along the Gila River this morning took us on a mile-and-a-half long loop trail under a clear, frosty 34-degree blue sky here near the Arizona and New Mexico state line. The bird trail ended up being well worth the minor effort to bundle up and get a little exercise in before breakfast, and with the eight o’clock hour approaching (the time we told our hosts that we’d like to eat), we had to head back.

Cat at the Simpson Hotel in Duncan, Arizona

Maliki the Cat enjoying the warm sun and a snuggle in front of the big window at the Simpson Hotel. As much as the Simpson acts as a hotel, it has a dual role as Bed & Breakfast. Deborah and Clayton, the proprietors of this historic building, made us a terrific homemade, gourmet breakfast, allowing us to move at a slower pace than would be typical when we are anxious to get out and start exploring the area.

Joyce and Juliette came down to join us after a bit, which slowed us down yet again. Talk of sandhill cranes, ghosts, hotel lore, and an interesting trail out by Virden, New Mexico.

Caroline Wise and John Wise at the Arizona and New Mexico state line near Virden, New Mexico

The interesting trail wasn’t found, but the state line was. Mea culpa time, as I’ve bragged countless times that Caroline has already passed over every state line crossing that Arizona has. Well, we’ve never been over this one. Now, before I go blowing my horn again, I think I’ll pore over a map and see which others I might have missed. Hmm, maybe I could blame this on the fact that paper maps never took us down to a close enough resolution, so this could have been an honest mistake.

Abandoned ranch house in western New Mexico

The outside turned out to be more interesting than the inside of this abandoned ranch house with its multitude of textures, all of them in different states of wear.

Gila River near Virden, New Mexico

I don’t think we drove much more than 20mph on our short loop out the Virden Highway and back up Franklin Road. Along the way, we stopped to admire a small flock of sandhill cranes in a farmer’s field, and then next door, Caroline pilfered a bunch of pecans that were still on the trees. She’d call it gleaning; I just hung my head in shame.

The muddy water racing by is the Gila River. It gets its start near the Continental Divide in some mountains east of us and then collects the waters of almost half a dozen other rivers as it passes through Phoenix until reaching the Colorado River down near Yuma, Arizona. After traveling a length of the river today and having watched the patterns of the sandhill cranes this morning, it is obvious that they stay very close to the river while out looking for food.

Caroline Wise at Hilda's Mexican Cafe in Duncan, Arizona

After a meander over the countryside listening to Westlin’ Winds by Robert Burns, we are back in Duncan at Hilda’s for some Mexican food though I wimped on trying the Meat Daddy, which now seems more appropriate while listening to At Seventeen by Janis Ian.

The Rugged and Obese could be the tagline for many of these out-of-the-way outposts that were once something and are now, more often than not, on their way to oblivion. From the amount of tossed-off beer cans, shooters, and broken glass the drinking problems that are supposed to relieve loneliness are hard at work here where little else is found.

Lunch is solid, but hopefully, not so much that it leads us to a siesta. While coffee might be in order about now to ward off drowsiness, we know in a place like this, it’ll be something along the lines of Folgers or Yuban, and after years of strong coffee, that stuff seems like water dolled up to look like coffee, but it’s not fooling us.

With nothing else needing our attention, the thought of just sitting here sipping coffee and smoking while talking about nothing sounds appealing if it weren’t for the fact we neither enjoy smoking nor is it allowed in restaurants anymore. Funny that we grew up in an age where smoking at the table was the norm. To compensate, Caroline has fetched her knitting while I swipe notes into my smartphone, allowing us to skip the chatting part, too; at least we have “coffee.”

Ruth just came in. Strangely enough, this is the third time running into her in less than 24 hours. Last night in Safford at Walgreens, we stopped and picked up Girl Scout cookies from her and the troop. Then, this morning, heading out of Duncan, we pull up to get gas, and there’s Ruth chaperoning some other girls, so we buy even more cookies we don’t need.

Drive-in Theater in Three Way, Arizona

We are way out in the middle of nowhere. The junction is called Three Way, and over 60 years ago, when this giant movie screen was erected, it must have drawn people in from far and wide. I can still hear the echoes of excitement as the car got into position and the tinny speaker was pulled into the car as maybe Cary Grant in To Catch A Thief or James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause flickered onto the screen back in 1955. Walking over to the refreshment counter for a fountain drink and the smell of fresh popcorn would round out the treat of visiting this window to the world that may as well have been a million miles away from those who worked on the ranches and in the mines of rural Arizona and New Mexico.

Looking out the Morenci Mine near Clifton, Arizona

While we miss the paper maps of yore, the in-dash panel of our Kia Niro hybrid features maps that are seriously accurate for letting us find alternate routes to places. A small side road took us out for some nice views towards Morenci and its mining operations (left side of the photo) and past the Clifton Cemetery.

Clifton, Arizona Cemetery

Masin Greenlee may be the most famous person buried at the Clifton Cemetery as one of the 15 counties in Arizona, Greenlee County is named after him. But there are 1098 other people buried in these rugged and rocky mountains, including a number of children such as Baby Goss here, who died December 30, 1924, on the same day this infant was born. There were a number of graves from back in that time where babies didn’t make it or lived only a few days before passing on.

Clifton, Arizona

Clifton, Arizona, is as close to being a ghost town as it can get. If the local mining operation were to cease, this town would blow away. Turns out that it’s almost washed away a number of times due to storms that created catastrophic flooding of the nearby San Francisco River.

This is not our first visit to Clifton, but it is one of the saddest. We’ve enjoyed peeking into derelict old buildings on previous visits, but today, they are mostly boarded up. We can only figure it’s due to vandalism. We’d ask someone, but nobody is around to ask. Most of the few shops that are here are closed on Saturday, which baffles us. There was one small shop open towards the end of Chase Creek Street where a young woman shared some of the pleasures and struggles of living in a town with such difficult living conditions regarding work and the availability of simple things like credit and loans to buy houses and such.

Speaking of Chase Creek Street, that catastrophic flooding I spoke of was exacerbated by the fact that the main road that slices through this part of Clifton and this historic district is part of the creek that, while small or non-existent in dry years, has been known to achieve flows of water that rival the Colorado river when reaching flood stages. We learned about this as we finally Googled why this town has giant steel doors at the south end of the place that are reminiscent of flood gates used in Japan, where tsunamis occur: those doors are part of Clifton’s flood control.

1941 Cadillac Flying Lady Hood Ornament seen in Clifton, Arizona

I think this is the Flying Lady from a 1941 Cadillac, but I’m only about 95% certain. I wonder if the owner knows these hood ornaments can sell for about $750, and if he did, would it still just be sitting out next to the street? A few doors down was another intriguing hood ornament on what might have been a 1950s Cadillac.

Big Horn Sheep in Clifton, Arizona

Getting ready to leave town, we ran into this team of bighorn sheep with that ram over there giving me stink eye more than once.

San Francisco River in Clifton, Arizona

This is the San Francisco River that in 1983, was moving 56,000 cubic feet per second of floodwater through its channel. Today during our visit, it’s only about 520 cubic feet per second. With fading light, we pointed the car south to return to Duncan and get some dinner at the Ranch House before settling in at our cozy hotel. As we head into being tired and seriously satisfied with the day, we are at a loss for what we might do tomorrow. Having that kind of flexibility is not a bad thing.

Duncan Arizona – Day 1

The Old West Highway a.k.a. Highway 70 in Eastern Arizona

In our ongoing effort to travel a judicious amount during 2020, we are heading east this afternoon on the Old West Highway to Duncan, Arizona. This is the hometown of Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, the first woman to serve on the court, but she’s not the reason we are heading out there. We are going to Duncan because it’s there.

We’re not really sure what we’ll do other than check into the Historic Simpson Hotel, where we’ll be sleeping in the Old Library Room for only $70 a night. Maybe we’ll head over to the Catwalk Recreation Area out by Mogollon, New Mexico, which, by the way, is one of our hopeful destinations this year, but they only operate seasonally. Hatch, New Mexico, is known for its famous chilies that could draw us in for food; it’s only about 140 miles away. Then there’s the Coronado Scenic Byway heading north out of town towards Alpine, Arizona, which might make for a nice drive, especially as it’s likely snowy up that way.

No matter what we ultimately do, we are at least getting out of town, and as we settle into our four-hour drive, we’ll be holding hands, trying to figure out which small town along the way will be adequate for our dining needs. Well, figuring it out might have been a thing had I not called our hotel and asked for recommendations, and I think I’ve already settled on La Paloma in Solomon, Arizona. If I can stick to this choice, Caroline will be incredibly grateful as wishy-washy John, who has been known to become a wee bit hangry when food uncertainty stands between him and a solid decision, can be a stressor for the wife. It’s shortly before 3:00 so I think I’ll go ahead and mosey on over to Caroline’s office and see if I can pry her away.

Sunset over Eastern Arizona

After the hustle of traffic out of the valley, we were able to cut out the frantic nature of our Friday departure and start to find the solace of the open desert that greets people leaving the Mesa area east of Phoenix. Up through some bouldery canyon area near Superior into the old west town of Globe before hitting the San Carlos Apache Reservation, we were leaving sunset behind us.

We stuck to our guns as far as restaurant choice went and were surprised by the effort. La Paloma is situated in a dark residential area and is quite the find. If you arrive by cover of darkness as we did, you may not believe you’ve even arrived; it’s that non-descript. Inside the front door, there were nearly a dozen others waiting for a table. We joined the wait and after finally being sat and waiting a fairly good time for our meal, we were soon talking of returning on Sunday for lunch.

The road forks somewhere east of Solomon, with one spur heading to Clifton and Morenci while the other cuts a nearly straight line through the inky moonless night. Three cars passed us in the 40 minutes it took us to approach within a few miles of New Mexico. After a good long time away from quiet, lonely roads out in the middle of nowhere, it felt good to find ourselves being reacquainted with a part of us that used to be quite familiar with such situations. As the nearly colorless desert scrolls by, it’s almost like an old song you want to sing along with, even if you no longer remember all the words.

The Old Library Room at the Simpson Hotel in Duncan, Arizona

The Simpson Hotel in Duncan is a charmer. They hosted a poetry reading tonight featuring author Joyce Benvenuto reading from her newest book, Road to Duncan. While we missed the reading, we had a pleasant chat with her and her daughter Juliette after our arrival. Now that they’ve gone upstairs, we are sitting in the lobby of the hotel with a cat curled up in a plush chair and a wall clock that sounds with a firm tick-tock.

It’s approaching 11:00, and my eyes are heavy, but the ambiance here draws us to keep plodding away, with me trying to add a few more details to the day and Caroline sewing the finishing touches on a handwoven dishcloth.

Discomfort

Wupatki National Monument in Arizona

Living somewhere doesn’t always make sense to those who weren’t on hand when the decision was made to do what was done. Maybe it was an economic decision or a defensive one; maybe it was proximity or distance that was desired. At some point, though, it is time to move on. The various people who took up residence here at Wupatki, starting back around 500 A.D., stayed for about 700 years before abandoning the site.

A young man I met a couple of years ago as a neighbor is moving on from Phoenix and heading back to his roots in rural Indiana with the hopes of finding something he has so far failed to discover. Originally a student at a local trade school, he soon figured out that he wouldn’t be as good a fit as he’d hoped, so he took up an apartment maintenance position where we live. Not long after trying his hand at this endeavor, he found he didn’t like it either, and so he quit. After two years in Arizona, it was time to try something new or old, depending on one’s perspective.

Grand Canyon National Park in Arizona

Knowing that Chris had been in Phoenix for two years and had never gotten out of the city, I couldn’t let it stand that come February 1st, when he flies out, he would have never been to the Grand Canyon, so I asked him if I could drag him up north.

With only two weeks before he left, I didn’t have much time to plan for a better date, so it was now or never. The weather forecast suggested there were only two days over the next ten that predicted partly cloudy weather, which looked the best we’d get, so I chose the closest day, that being today, Thursday, January 16, 2020.

Chris Elliot at Grand Canyon National Park in Arizona

If the snow on the ground wasn’t too bad, my plan was to take him on a short hike on the South Kaibab Trail out to Cedar Ridge. As luck would have it for Chris, the snow was pretty heavy, but there was a more important factor at work. Chris has some serious vertigo that stops him from going up to the third floor of the Desert View Watchtower. I hadn’t picked up on this outside when he didn’t get very close to the railing at the overlook.

I tried to get him to the top of the Watchtower, offering him assurance, but he let me know that it simply couldn’t happen as he was seriously uncomfortable. I knew at this point that regardless of the state of the trail, there was no way this guy was going to be able to stomach being out on the ledge of an unprotected narrow pathway cut out of the rocky cliffside we’d be hugging on the mile and a half walk out to the overlook.

Grand Canyon National Park in Arizona

Chris was overwhelmed by the scale of the Grand Canyon, which was exceeding his expectations. He flinched more than once, even while we were driving when he caught sight of the chasm just beyond a couple of trees and a cliffside.

Grand Canyon National Park in Arizona

Reaching Grand Canyon Village and El Tovar Hotel, in particular, it was time to get something to eat. As today was my treat and Chris, my guest, I thought I’d take him somewhere relatively nice, and the El Tovar dining room meets that criterion. Little did I know that this, too, was going to be greeted with discomfort. He’d never eaten in such a nice place and was wondering when he’d be asked to leave.

Some background is probably in order, and hopefully, I don’t cross the line of information that would intrude on anybody’s privacy, but this seriously nice and generous guy has been traveling a difficult road of uncertainty and his own fair share of relative bad luck. From estranged family members, homelessness, a short stint in the military, and some time in the Phoenix area that didn’t bring him to finding himself, he’s once again going to be looking for that thing that’s been elusive to his search.

Chris Elliot at Grand Canyon National Park in Arizona

His own generosity was gifted to three fellow veterans who were also in need by sharing his apartment with them. His hope was that with someone else caring about their welfare, they’d recognize the gesture and that it would help them escape their own personal discomfort of trying to exist in the chasm of what can be an isolating American life where the economy is the space between, and community is like the snow on the ground: cold and soon thin or gone. Little seems to have come from his efforts, as it appears they benefited at his expense.

Now, without a penny to his name but in possession of a plane ticket, Chris will leave Arizona, having seen one of the seven wonders of the earth. His destination is home. It leaves people who know him asking why and trying to warn him about the dangers of going home where the ruin of what was will likely be in a greater state of decay. The distance of time doesn’t close the gap or work to create bridges to places that didn’t exist in the first place, but as a bit of a fatalist, he doesn’t know what else to do.

Chris is approaching 30 years old and is still wandering somewhere deep within, unable to see real options ahead. It seems that the distance to his other side is on a scale with the Grand Canyon. His vertigo and discomfort with situations right before him have him taking a step back to the relative comfort of what he knows. I sure hope his next move is into a future that helps him find what he’s looking for.

Poop Hypocrisy

Poop

Would this poop be more palatable if I told you it wasn’t human? Would it be acceptable to poop on the sidewalk if I told you the dog that created it is homeless? What exactly makes human poop seriously gross compared to the deuce dropped by a shepherd, labrador, or mongrel? Oh, maybe it’s that you picture in your mind the deplorable human being you already see as a form of excrement that left some of his malodorous waste in the same place? If it is some tongue-lolling cute dog with a wagging tail, the shit that falls from its ass is somehow nicer, friendlier, not so threatening, huh?

Shit is shit, but the biased human pieces of shit who want to somehow eradicate the homeless shitters in their communities believe they are dealing with an epidemic that the wave of a hand can solve. Hey, you people who are moving into renovated former ghettos where destitute people once took refuge in the flophouses that you paid a cool million for, you displaced these people in your need of a hipster existence in the central core of a city that happens to have a booming economy.

You take your $2,000 dog out for a walk and have no qualms that your elite mutt, which eats K9 Natural Lamb Feast Raw Grain-Free Freeze-Dried Dog Food that costs you $20 a feeding, craps on the street, but you forgot the poo-bag, so you can justify the shit smear on the street as being all-natural expensive shit as opposed to the products of drug-addled human scum who are excreting the remains of the Chipotle they dug out of the trash. Why isn’t your dog’s shit as gross as a homeless person’s butt-spunk? Fuck you.

Every day in a 1-mile radius around my neighborhood, there are no less than six new steaming piles of feculence, and not one of those piles of stool is from some homeless person. On the contrary, they are being left where they fall off a dog that lives in a house being walked by a person that lives in a house. The number of homeless people I see with dogs is minuscule, but the comfortable wretches who might believe there are lesser human beings who should collect the turds of their terrier are abundant, and yet NOBODY is complaining about well-kept dogs leaving dung balls everywhere.

This poop hypocrisy is a load of shit in its own right. How the hell do we hold a homeless person or government official accountable for someone who needs to heed the call of nature with a satisfying number 2, relieving the pressure of a full shit-sock but has nowhere to go?

Please, someone, tell me where the homeless are supposed to go. As someone who lives indoors, drives places, and doesn’t have dogs, I occasionally have the need to leave some feces in a place other than my personal fudge pot, and I know firsthand how difficult that can be when everywhere you look you find signs that admonish you that, “Restrooms are for customers only.” Well, leaving a deposit of what had been a $75 dinner the night before it magically turned into a brown creamy stinking load might be considered a way of giving you my business. Thus, I’m a kind of customer.

If I were a dog and the person taking me into their responsibility were to fail to recognize that my paws are not able to bag my own poop, maybe they shouldn’t be allowed the privilege of sharing time with me? Who are these people who get a free pass to have their animals scatter their nightsoil to the wind and then turn around and hold people of lesser means to higher standards?