What is it about “normal” that makes my skin crawl? I can handle it in small amounts, but I’m forever hunting for the personality quirk or edge that allows me to find something redeeming in people I meet or identify an aspect of film, literature, music, or art that displays a hint of brilliance that goes beyond expectation. Reducing it even further, I’d say I’m looking for an inkling of authenticity but not affected authenticity.
Abrasiveness without stupidity, ambition without snobbery, awkwardness because of curiosity, these things seem to manifest in people and things I enjoy knowing and exploring. On the other hand, there’s the adoption of trendy shit to make someone appear relevant, which only exacerbates their fakeness and triggers me to recoil from their grotesque figure.
John, why now? We are closing in on leaving for a vacation in which our time is going to be spent on a 100-mile stretch of the Central California Coast from Monterey south to Cambria. While everything will likely be fine, I’m anticipating the crass arrogance of needy Californians living in the center of their own tiny universe to be in full effect. Now amplified by the travel crush that is busting out of the pandemic, instead of happily going into a break from that ugly routine, I’m afraid these selfish people will only see their own need to be out front without shame, demanding they get all they want. When I consider that this is typical of California in the best of times, I really wish I wasn’t aware of this right now.
The reality is likely not to be what I’m anticipating as we are not interested in the 17-mile drive through Carmel or visiting the Nepenthe Restaurant. Our route will take us north out of Monterey to the Elkhorn Slough, not a popular place. While we are staying at Treebones Resort south of Big Sur, there is nothing there that would draw in day visitors or cause traffic jams. In Cambria, we can meander north to find a quiet corner somewhere. While in Monterey itself, our visit to the aquarium is during a members-only reopening, and entries are timed in order to limit how many people are in the place at any one time. If you think you hear me trying to convince myself to be calm, you are right.