Will you have lived, or will you have only been? The path we are walking in this life is littered with beauty, where tears are able to manifest when you see and sense just how essential it all is. Have you been in love with your own life? Is your perception tuned to the real or that which you hope is real? Who is here to define such things or teach us how to belong to life instead of life belonging to us?

Church was the artifice of nature when that which was in the wild frightened our souls. Our best music takes us for a walk outdoors under the shimmering leaves of spring past the pooling water that mirrors the forest above. We are enchanted with the glistening surface of the river and the delicate skills of the bird seeking out its existence on its bank. We are exalted on the throne of breathing, and yet there is little recognition of how sacrosanct this innate opportunity is to be present.

When all that is embodied in the nature of beauty is found in the face and eyes of the one you love, do you not shed a heavy tear when denied this chance to gaze within yourself and upon that face when you feel the most vulnerable?

As I walked along the forest path on my way to Superbooth, I couldn’t help but recognize the profound opportunity that has been afforded me to not only find some beguiling personalities, esoteric and sublime pieces of engineering, but also an hour of walking alone in my thoughts. I have had little regard for schedules as what I will take from the conference awaits me. The serendipity of the day is a dish best sampled out of randomness.

My first visit of the day upon my arrival is with Eric who is the founder of Landscape.fm. Arriving back in Phoenix, Arizona, after this sojourn to all things indulgent, I hope to find one of these devices pictured above. This little green and gold box with blue and silver knobs is the HC-TT or Human Controlled Tape Transport. What is it precisely? A long-awaited accessory to my Eurorack setup that will allow me to manually play cassettes into my synthesizer. Eric’s first run of these sold out fairly quickly over a year and a half ago; I’ve patiently been waiting for one to be sent to me. We will be upon that day soon.

The celebration of friendship between Philip Mease and Yoni Newman had the guys dancing in the aisles of Superbooth while the band played bleeps and bloops with a dash of feedback thrown in that only enhanced the festivities. I can point out right now that of all the laughter I will have shared during my stay in Berlin and specifically here at this conference in the woods, these two knowledgeable and creative guys notched my experience up more than a couple of degrees. Should I ever make it to another Superbooth, they will be some of the first people I run to say hello to again.

You may have noticed from the banner behind them that they are responsible for the evolving universe of Rabid Elephant. I was one of the lucky few to have obtained unobtainium in their Natural Gate last year with their second run of modules. The price of used units skyrocketed in the past months for those averse to waiting for the next run which appears to be on the horizon. Portal Kick is their next module to come to market, and from what I’ve heard, it will set a new paradigm on how we shape drum sounds. The sample and hold function is wicked. I should be careful about how much I contribute to the hype, as I’d like to be certain I get in on the first batch.

Carlo and Lana were at the booth of Brandon Fessler, who is the founder of Mordax. Brandon is the maker of the DATA which I wrote briefly about back during my visit to Synthplex in Los Angeles at the end of March. It’s great to find familiarity with some of the people who attend these events.

This is the Meatlog with a meat pretzel. Scott Jaeger of Industrial Music Electronics for the past year had enthusiastically encouraged me to attend Superbooth this year, and while I didn’t need much convincing, it’s been great seeing him in his element, demonstrating the modules I had some small part in helping him bring to market. I did notice that many of his customers tend to be tall; I wonder how he builds that attraction into his modules. A rumor I heard while milling around his booth was that there appears to be a sweet spot on the Piston Honda when tuned to certain low frequencies and a particular octave while in unison mode that is said to produce DMT-like visions in the listener’s mind.

Future Sound Systems was on hand, but of course, they were because why wouldn’t everyone who makes Eurorack modules who lives in Europe not descend on Berlin to share their wares? On the right is Finlay Shakespeare, and after I find out again who is on the left I’ll share that information too. These guys have made modules with Chris Carter of Throbbing Gristle and Chris & Cosey fame, and their new modules are being built in cooperation with Daniel Miller of MUTE Records.

Love the smile of the guy photobombing my shot, but it’s the guy’s face in the center that I felt best represents the expression of so many people when looking at a Eurorack setup and trying to figure out what the heck is going on. BTW the guy in the yellow t-shirt is Matthew Allum, the founder of ALM / Busy Circuits.

This is Daniel Miller in another incarnation of who he is. Today, he’s a live performer on a Eurorack synthesizer, forcing many in the crowd in front of the stage to cower with their ears covered as they try to escape the heavy pressure of some deep low-frequencies he’s sending out. Daniel likely holds a special place in the formative history of many a creative person around the earth as the founder of MUTE Records; he’s the guy who brought us Depeche Mode, though for me, it was his contribution to the Throbbing Gristle catalog and later his promotion of Nitzer Ebb that endeared me to his label. Then there was The Normal, who gave us Warm Leatherette, which was an anthem of alternative music back when I was 15 years old. I heard that Daniel DJ’ed on a water taxi returning to Mitte later that night, but I missed it. I wonder what other hats he enjoys wearing?

FucKETy BuCkEty frontman Ken MacBeth took the stage by storm, insistent that he would take no prisoners and remain as uncompromising about his onstage performance as his direct, often confrontational interpersonal communication. I believe anyone who ever met Ken knows that particular hand gesture that comes at them with a bark of “SHUT UP!” Bald Beardy Man in the background on the right was responsible for the soundtrack to this evening’s festivities, though the man behind ShitKatapult, Marco Haas, aka T.Raumschmiere, was over in his corner of the stage occasionally adding some electronic stabs of one sort or other. The secret MacBeth instrument was plugged in, and what its role was will forever remain a mystery as no one is said to have seen it, and you couldn’t be certain it was heard.

Mr. Shitkatapult dominated the lyrical content during the first bit of the performance. I can’t help but think this only antagonized Ken to work his way into a frenzy so that when he laid into Convincing People by Throbbing Gristle, he was nearly but not quite thoroughly pissed. I was never sure when SK (short for Shitkatapult) was going to finally leave the stage; he threatened it often but always came back for more. If I were a betting man, I’d have to guess he returned because before the performance got underway, a case of beer was delivered to the stage.

Maybe it was after the two versions of Joy Division’s Isolation, but at some point, Ken leaped into the water like a deft dolphin, emerging from the depths to not only walk on water but to come out pointing at the mother fucker who was about to be confronted in the audience. While Mr. MacBeth has obviously demonstrated his ability to channel Jesus, he wasn’t able to leave the lake with dry clothes, so I’m not all too sure about just how pious the man is, though I do know that he is quite sanctimonious.

For his encore of this latest rendition of the FucKETy BuCkEty brand of shenanigan antics, Ken, in his rage, violently threw himself into the depths of the lake as a kind of water-immolation. Some say he slipped, but fuck that; this was part of the art and spectacle that runs deep in the veins and guts of Bald Beardy Man, the ShitKatapult, and fucking Ken MacBeth. If you were on hand and didn’t enjoy yourself, just SHUT UP about it.

For me, the evening would take a bizarre turn of events when I ran into the apparition of David Bowie. Okay, so it was Ken MacBeth, still drying out, who put on his crooner’s voice and serenaded me while taking requests for Bowie songs. From Lodger and Scary Monsters to Blackstar, he worked his way through them like a pro. On my request for Where Are We Now, he winced, pointing out that this was a good one, and if I’m not mistaken, he might have brought a misty eye to his rendition. So there we are in the middle of the night in the forest near Berlin with the holy damp dolphin singing to me; it doesn’t get better than that.